You often feel tired, moody. You struggle to lose that stubborn 5 kgs from having been stuck at home during the last pandemic. You even think that you stopped having the ability to lose weight all together! You have aches and pains here and there. You suffer from brain fog. You name it.

You accept this as the new normal! You are getting older. You work too much.

You take pills to get those recurring headaches away, supplements to get more energy, drugs to regulate your blood pressure, hormones, blood sugar…

You do not question anything. You trust the healthcare system. You believe life will slow down for you. You keep going.

What about asking why?

Start asking why! Keep asking why!

This is what functional medicine does.

What the heck is Functional Medicine & why should you care?

You are used to going to the GP when you don’t feel well.

Functional medicine goes a level deeper. Functional medicine wants to understand the root causes of your symptoms, why your body is not functioning as it should and wil focus on restoring the way it should be!

You are meant to be full of energy to thrive and live your best life!

If you look at a tree, imagine YOU are the tree!

The branches & leaves are the product of the nourishment of the soil.

Conventional medicine will aim to fix the branches and the leaves. Give you solutions to make the leaves greener (drugs), fix the branches with a bandage…etc.

You Are You Because Of YOU!

You have your own lifestyle and environment that you live in.

As a functional medicine health coach, I will look closely at you at your tree, the roots, the soil to grow greener leaves, new leaves, stronger branches. We will co-create a plan to nourish yourself to flourish!

Approaching your health with a strict diet and cruel hours at the gym is NOT the way…

Your wellbeing is a mixture of modifiable lifestyle factors

• Nutrition

• Rest & Relaxation

• Movement & Exercises

• Stress management & resilience.

With Functional Medicine coaching, we address the areas you want to work on and find simple solutions that fit you, what you like, what resonates with you, and what can fit into your life to make them long-lasting & sustainable.

We teach you lifelong strategies & tips to live your best vibrant life.

You have the keys to your health! You have the power to heal!

What you are doing is just suppressing the symptoms.

You have wisdom in you and know if something is wrong with you or not; what is good for you and what is not. If you are not satisfied with the answers you get from your conventional doctor on your symptoms next time, if you sense that something is not right with you: keep asking why!? Address the causes of your symptoms! Work on your soil. Nourish your mind & body with the functional medicine principles to flourish!

You have the keys to your health. You have the power to heal!

Big thanks to Bene for this brilliant blog. If you want to get in touch with Bene you can find her on Sistr and at Facebook, Instagram, and visit her website for more info.

The post What The Heck Is Functional Medicine & Why Should You Care? appeared first on Sistr Blog.

Anita Goyal MBE shares her tips so we can LEARN to be happy and successful.

What’s the Secret to True Happiness?

If there was one secret to achieving true happiness, wouldn’t we all do it? But life just isn’t that simple. To be happy and successful we have to work at it. But working at it isn’t the same as hard work, or tough work. Working towards success and happiness can be fun, enlightening, a pleasure in itself. I’m a firm believer that when we look at our lives and assess them, we can formulate what it takes for us to be happy – and a great starting point is G Cubed. If we give, feel grateful, and grow, we not only feel comfortable in our own skin, and develop the confidence to achieve, but we are able to support others to do the same (G³= Happiness).

The LEARN Strategy

With this in mind I would like to share my LEARN strategy. By fulfilling five aspects of life, we can LEARN to be happy, and live an enriched and fulfilling life. It is this strategy that I take into the classroom through my Personal Development Workshops to encourage emotional intelligence from an early age. These are tools we all need to live by, but many of us – me included – only discover them as adults.

What does LEARN stand for?

L – Love

E – Enrich

A – Appreciate

R – Relationships

N – Networks

Love

Let’s start with Love. Following the sudden death of my first husband I was forced to reassess my whole life up until that point. I had been in a troubled and challenging marriage, and had allowed duty to supersede love as my driving force. You not only have to learn the importance of choosing a partner, or people to surround you, that you love, but to learn to love yourself. To appreciate your own qualities, and to celebrate them.

Enrich

Next comes Enrich. When you enrich your life you evolve, and you can evolve into the best version of you. I truly believe I am my best me, and living my best life, but that wasn’t always the case. I have learned through experience, and I continuously seek out new ideas and challenges. During lockdown many of us learned new skills – anything from cross-stitch to a new language! It’s so valuable to enrich your life with new skills and avenues.

Every new year I create a vision board and set myself goals for the coming year. For several years I had wanted to host my own podcast, so that went on my board every year. Then during lockdown I had the time and the motivation. I put the feelers out on LinkedIn, I found the right team, and now I host a successful podcast and have had some truly incredible guests join me on it. This has enriched my life and career and given me a new creative outlet. It is important that we don’t just collect material objects, but experiences, and then we share these experiences with others.

Appreciation

Appreciation is a critical quality that we can all apply. As vice president of children’s charity Barnardo’s, and Ambassador of the Alzheimer’s Society and Hallmark Care Homes, I feel grateful every day for the incredibly hard-working teams we have that have worked throughout the pandemic to support the most vulnerable in our society.

I also believe in personal appreciation. When I return home from a trip I am grateful for my home, for my bath, for my bed. I spend a few moments every day to explore gratitude and encourage everyone to sit, reflect, and appreciate. The more you acknowledge your gratitude, the easier it is to identify, and it encourages a positive outlook that can be applied to all aspects of life.

Relationships

Relationships are a vital part of life, but it is important we create the right relationships with the right people, so that we can allow ourselves to truly be ourselves.

Relationships with close friends and family need nurturing. If, like in my first marriage, you are confronted with disruption and have to deal with a lack of emotional connection it contaminates all aspects of your life. You need to form positive relationships, support loved ones, and ensure you are able to have a relationship with yourself and identify your true needs in order to be true to yourself.

A good friend gave me the book Are You The One For Me by Barbara De Angelis and it is the book that changed my life. It enabled me to know what I was looking for in my next partner, and to know my non-negotiables when it comes to forming relationships. When I met my now-husband, Avnish, eight years ago, I was in exactly the right frame of mind and he delivered everything that I needed. We are an empowered partnership and encourage each other to thrive. That is what a healthy relationship should be.

Networks

Finally, we have Networks, and whether these are networks of friends, family, or like-minded business people, they are essential to creating a rounded character who can reach their full potential. There is a saying that you are the average of your five closest peers. I firmly believe this. Together we can be stronger. I draw from my networks for advice, for support, for help in furthering business prospects, and I make sure I give back too.

If I identify someone I would like to be in my network I explore how we can communicate and work with each other. Much of our business is formed from networks and Avnish and I will often dine with people in our networks and attend events to expand our network.

One prime example is the inspirational Pinky Lilani. Pinky is an author, motivational speaker and women’s advocate and also founded the Asian Women of Achievement Awards. I ensured I was able to access her network and worked towards mutual goals, and through hard work and perseverance found myself on a trip to Cambodia with her. You create your own success and I was able to observe somebody I admire hugely, from a close perspective, due to networking well.

I would advise people to identify who they would like to be in their network, then to reach out, be it over social media, by inviting them to events, or establishing mutual networking opportunities. Don’t be afraid to identify your goals and do what it takes to achieve them.

Emotional Intelligence is Key

By encompassing all elements of LEARN into our lives, and teaching children to adopt this approach from an early age, we can work towards success and happiness, and developing an emotional intelligence from a young age.

My aim is to bring this outreach personal development programme to 10,000 young people by December this year. The enrichment programme is free, I want to help and to make a lasting difference, and after the past 18 months emotional intelligence and a healthy mindset has never been more crucial for the development of the next generation. For more information on this and to involve your school or young people take a look at our video here.

Anita Goyal MBE is the chair of the Hemraj Goyal Foundation, Trustee of the Hallmark care homes Foundation and founder of the Enrichment Experiences in Education programme. She is a passionate philanthropist, international speaker, an author and host of the Relight Your Fire podcast.

Big thanks to Anita for her wise words here and the session she did for us at sistr on G Cubed. If you missed it, you can watch again here and connect with Anita on the sistr network.

The post Learn to be happy and successful appeared first on Sistr Blog.

Super PT and women’s health expert Jem Brooks shares her game changing 5 tips to help you get in sync with your hormone health. Our hormones influence so much in life from exercise to work to relationships. Women have a number of huge life stages between puberty and menopause. And every month we have a natural cycle, of an average 28 days. As we start to get closer to our forties we may notice suddenly that our usual exercise routine and the way we eat doesn’t serve us anymore, and we have no idea why. Our body composition changes. We retain weight around our belly, we feel tired and demotivated.

It’s no surprise that a billion-pound diet industry makes it really confusing to know what actually works to help you have the body you feel fabulous in. It almost feels like a constant struggle for women with so many pressures to look good as well as work, look after a home and perhaps also children. Often grabbing the wine seems the best way to relax!

Don’t Worry, It’s All Normal

Let me tell you that all of this is normal. A quote I adore that really resonates with every woman I work with is, “Women are not small men”, from the fabulous Dr Stacy Sims.

So here are a few tips to help get you thinking and get a handle on your hormone health, now and during peri-menopause so you can adapt to a more cyclical way of exercising & living.

1. Realise you are not a small man!

This is powerful so read on.

A man’s rhythm is typically 24 hours. A man will wake up in the morning with testosterone at its highest and it gradually tapers off during the day. The same pattern repeats itself day in day out.

A woman however, has fluctuations of oestrogen, progesterone and testosterone over the course of a menstrual cycle that impact hormone health. How can we be expected to be the same day in and day out, let alone live, exercise & work like a man?

2. Get to know your hormones

A woman’s menstrual cycle is divided into two halves.

Follicular phase

Day 1-14 (based on 28 day cycle).  Oestrogen is the dominant and rising hormone during this phase. Then LH & FSH surge to release the egg at ovulation.

During this phase you may notice that your energy levels are likely to increase, peaking as you reach ovulation. Your mood may become more motivated and optimistic and you may be feeling more happy in your body, due to the rising oestrogen.

Luteal phase

Day 15-28 (again based on a 28 day cycle).  Progesterone comes into play after ovulation and we have rising levels of both oestrogen & progesterone, until they both drop off sharply before your period starts.

During this phase you may notice your energy levels tapering off with a desire to retreat and go inwards, as you get closer to your bleed. You may notice you experience PMT symptoms, from bloating, cramps, cravings, disturbed sleep to increased anxiety towards the middle of this phase due to the rapid drop from oestrogen & progesterone.

This is a text book example when you have a 28 Day cycle. These phases can vary in length for each of us and can change considerably in peri- menopause, varying cycle length, flow and the onset of anovulatory cycles before ceasing once we reach menopause. But I have a beautiful way to maintain a cyclical approach to your life still.

3. Your menstrual cycle is an indicator of your health

Every cycle is unique, we all have our own experience during our cycle and when we bleed. But struggling with heavy periods, headaches, bloating, anxiety, fatigue to name a few, can all be signs that something including hormone health is out of balance with your overall health/lifestyle.

Find your personal hormone health patterns

The best way to start to fully understand your cycle and any symptoms you may be experiencing is to gather your own individual data.

To do this, you simply track your cycle. You can do this on an app or use a good old-fashioned diary or paper tracker.

You start by recording the length of your cycle. Then add data, such as your mood, energy levels, cervical fluid changes, Basal Body Temperature, appetite and cramps to name a few.

From here you can start to notice patterns and trends.

4. You don’t have to exercise hard all the time

All too often women come to me with the misconception that they need to exercise for longer and eat less! It’s counterproductive and can send the stress hormone cortisol to high levels.

Exercise with your own hormone health rhythm

Once you get to know your cycle there is a rhythm that you can bring into your exercise routine. This flows with your hormone health, working in sync with them.

I’m a big advocate of choosing movement that you enjoy. You are more likely to form a regular habit. But there are a few types of movement that really help promote muscle development.

When in my cycle should I do hardcore exercise?

During our Follicular phase we can dial our training up. We can lift heavier, do more HIIT, run faster and use plyomemtic training.

When in my cycle should I take it easy?

In the Luteal phase we dial it down. Focus more on skill-based movement, linked to goals doing more restorative types of movement like Pilates & mobility.

Remember, as we mature it becomes harder for us to build & maintain lean muscle each decade. Then with the absence of oestrogen & progesterone once we reach menopause, it’s even harder. Any muscle that we can build before this transition is great.

5. Is it too late to start strength training?

No, it’s never too late and strength training is great for women to help build lean muscle mass and shift belly fat, which we know both become harder to maintain as we mature.

Start at your own level, and if that’s body weight, begin there and nail the technique.

What are the best moves to do when starting strength training?

Some basic moves are squats (I like Sumo/Plié with toes turned out to work the inner thigh), reverse lunges, lateral lunges and deadlifts. All of these can be safely built up from body weight to using weights and working the arms & legs at the same time.

A final note

The biggest thing that changed the health and lives of so many of the women I work with is becoming aware of their menstrual cycle and hormone health. They feel stronger, fitter, empowered, energised and uplifted and no longer beat themselves up for not working out hard all the time.

Exercising and living in alignment with your cycle can start from today. It’s not only good for your health, it will touch many elements of your life from helping your relationships to how you go about living, working and one day, if not already, transitioning into menopause.

Sending you lots of love on your journey.

Love,

Jem

x

A huge thank you to Jem Brooks for the tips and advice on hormone health. If you’d like to reach out you can do so through the sistr platform or have a listen to the awesome menopause talk she did with Katy Howell and Dr. Allie Grimston in full on sistr’s YouTube platform.

The post 5 Things To Help You Get In Sync With Your Hormone Health appeared first on Sistr Blog.

Talking books, boardrooms and babies with Danusia Malina-Derben  and a very extensive CV!

Global Leadership Consultant, Business Owner, Speaker, Podcast Host, Author of Noise: A Manifesto Modernising Motherhood, Founder and ‘badass mum of…10’! The reason we list mum of 10 at the end is that Danusia is keen not to be introduced by her baggy vagina (her words!) as the first badge that springs to mind. So rather than focus on how the heck she juggles 10 kids, let’s look at the journey and drive that got her to where she is today. 

Yes of course kids play a huge part in the drive. One could go as far to say that they fuel the fire to succeed. Danusia is quick to point out that she is a professional human being first and, “oh, by the way, I also have 10 kids”.

And it’s this attitude that has propelled her to the Boardroom and where she is today.

A mum at 17, 4 kids by 22 but Danusia knew she wanted a real career, a career that sat detached from the stigma of motherhood and what that meant in the working world. 

“Do you have a prolapse after 10 kids? No, I have a Boardroom”.

Enough said. We could end the chat right there. It can be done. It requires a huge element of self-definition. When 4 kids in 5 years aren’t planned you’re not fuelling a fire, you’re entering a baptism of fire. A sink or swim. An acceptance that kids are putting your career on hold or an acknowledgement that you are not going to drown in being a Mum. 

Danusia knew that she’d have to get pretty smart about carving out a career and continuing to be ‘herself’ and not Danusia the Mum. A lot of us emerge in our 40’s, the kids are a bit older and we seek out our path older and wiser. Danusia was finding herself at the age of 22. That’s an entirely different mental state to be in. To simultaneously find yourself at that young age whilst raising kids takes resilience, a depth of character and an acceptance. The acceptance is that it’s fine to want to excavate the journey of holding onto herself whilst also going through births and pregnancies. 

Danusia points out that you’ve got to play the cards you’ve got and play them wisely. She quickly got herself a mentor and a sponsor who were crucial and integral to the journey. They created a platform for Danusia to be both the sponge and the stone, the listener and the creator. And of course there were critics along the way. Establishments and characters who doubted the ability to carve out a career whilst raising so many young kids. 

“Get yourself a degree” was the advice that came out of mentoring. To be taken seriously, get yourself a degree. These days it’s questionable how relevant a degree is, does it really set you apart? Does it provide better building blocks than say someone with an entrepreneurial spirit and drive? Personally I’d say doubtful but off Danusia went and got herself a degree with no A Levels behind her.

She refers to a great example of the critical voice when a University advised Danusia to defer her place. “We think you’re great and we see the potential but we think you should defer and come back in 10 years”. Defer 10 years for what? To raise her kids and then address the career itch 10 years later. Was the advice taken on board? Of course not. Danusia completed a degree at another University and then returned to the particular ‘defer’ University 3 years later as a PhD student. 

Sometimes the proof is in the pudding. 

So does she see herself as selfish to pursue her career? Danusia states that Motherhood is built on sacrifice and compromise and being selfless. It’s often questionable where the line and interpretation of ‘selfless’ and ‘selfish’ falls. Which camp do working mums fall into? Ask the inner critic and we’d probably all say ‘selfish’. We’re raised to be ‘other people’ focused and people pleasers. If there’s any time left after that, then we can look after ourselves.

But how do you keep being yourself? Is that selfish? Danusia stresses the importance of not listening to the noise that says be less of yourself and actually put the effort into being more of yourself. We actually need to be ‘full of ourselves’ so that we can concentrate on and be clear about what we want. Mothers need to be self-focused – ask yourself what am I teaching my children by not looking after myself? What we need to be saying is ‘yes, it’s good for our children that we look after ourselves as mothers’. But, if it’s something we’re doing for ourselves, then tell them it’s for ourselves rather than for them. We’re not taking ‘me time’ to be a better mother, we’re taking it for ourselves and there is nothing selfish about that. 

“Self care is a tonic so we can be ourselves,not so that we can be better for our kids”.

So how do you ‘own’ the boardroom? Danusia explains that she accepts being terrified is part of the process in amplifying what you’re aiming for. Take the fear, push it wider. Then push it wider again. Have the audacity to step into more and ask for more. Ask yourself what’s bigger than what you’ve already coped with? Be brave enough to vocalise your fear, admit your failures and acknowledge your mistakes.

Disastrous things can absolutely happen but they don’t define you, they build you. Danusia stresses the importance of communication. The more we talk about not having a smooth linear path, the better. Why? Because it’s reality and we do each other a huge disservice by pretending everything is plain sailing. From failure, confidence is built and we need that confidence to challenge the fear!

The post Being Badass: Books, Boardrooms & Babies appeared first on Sistr Blog.

Mentorship, either being a mentor as well as being a mentee is such a powerful tool. Whether you’re navigating a change, reaching the heights of your career or, just starting out, connecting to mentors can open up the ability to pursue opportunities. In forming connections, you can create a loop of accountability and feedback that is essential in a career journey, whatever stage that journey might be at. 

Here we look at some top tips and advice around mentoring from Rebecca Foden and Andrea Gamson. 

Why have a mentor?

The strength to pivot

Today’s workplace is so incredibly intricate, potentially fast moving, life changing and pivotal. The ability to manoeuvre is critical and there is often little room for error. Having a mentor, a sounding board, often someone with more experience, provides an opportunity to understand and acknowledge the best ways to navigate that work for you. 

The need to seek the uncomfortable.

The more uncomfortable you are the more it means you’re on the right track especially if you have higher aspirations. Set yourself a career plan and then find a mentor who can help you break it down into smaller pieces. No matter how small, having guidance on the pieces can often stop the overwhelm and keep you focused. 

The creation of career hacks 

What can you learn to make aggregate career hacks? How can you then disrupt yourself to get that career hack? Everyone deep down, even if they won’t admit it, loves telling their story. Reach out to people you want to mentor you and ask them to tell their story. Listen, learn and apply the ‘learns’ to your own career. 

The choice of mentor role

You can have a traditional mentoring relationship whereby you are one-to-one. Your dynamic is that of dealing with specific issues with a clear and defined ‘to-do’ list, targets and goals. 

There is also the informal mentoring route – your industry ‘north stars’. These can be people you want to walk in the footsteps of. They are aspirational role models who you look up to, perhaps they have similar values, a similar background or have walked a path you’re trying to tread. More often than not these role models are ones you may follow on social media. In doing so, you see their posts everyday and hearing their voice, so a bit of them rubs off onto you. You may carry their words into your working day. You may take a tip from them that they’ve given that morning. It may be as simple as asking yourself “what would so-and-so do in this situation?”.

Mentoring doesn’t need to be a personal contact. There are amazing mentors who exist in your virtual world who talk ‘up and out’ and have incredible platforms that they are leveraging to do so. Technically you can see this as reverse mentoring. They put an opinion out there on a platform and you can be feeding back to them through social media or by putting their message into practise on what they’re advising on. 

The ability to be a sponge and a stone

It’s the age old saying: to be a great leader, don’t be a genius, be a sponge and a stone. There’s a common misconception that to be a great leader, you are incredibly smart. But in reality, most super successful people aren’t always the smartest in the room, they have an attribute that sets them apart: the ability to be a sponge and a stone. 

Sponges will continuously seek and absorb new information. Sponges are highly curious, information gatherers who take what they gather and learn from it. They build exceptionally strong networks around themselves, networks that they tap into, constantly asking questions and learning, learning, learning. An effective sponge will have role models or heroes who could be anyone that they find inspirational and from these people a sponge will soak up everything about that person. 

Stones display fearlessness taking on a challenge from not just one angle, but every single angle possible. They go the extra mile. The mindset of stones is to believe the impossible is possible, that beyond all else you can make that idea work. A stone will also work multiple ideas at the same time, the brain is buzzing, the curiosity is at its highest and stones will often have an immense amount of ideas and energy to burn. 

A common error and one that can be fatal, is to be advised to concentrate on just the one idea, to focus your energy into one pot. Activity is sure to be part of that stone’s DNA as is the desire to gather as much knowledge as possible. Pursue the challenges, allow someone to embrace the multiple angles that are inspiring them. 

The power of preparation

If you pursue a traditional mentoring role then be prepared. Agree in advance what you’re looking to achieve from the meetings. Each side – both the mentee and the mentor – is accountable. Mentoring relationships that pursue this route can often have lists of red tasks – all the areas that the mentee might be struggling with. Be prepared to do the homework and tick off the agreed task – remove the personal barrier, tick if off, move onto the next one. 

The recognition of the squiggly career path

So you’re taking a bit of time to open up to the idea of mentoring. Or perhaps you’ve been offered advice but you might not be ready to put it into practise. That’s just fine. You might not be in a place where you’re ready to be challenged or challenge yourself. Don’t punish yourself, wait for the right time or find a critical friend, someone who isn’t always going to agree with you. You might not like what you hear but, there’ll always be a part of their voice that you absorb and put into practise. Even if you might not want to admit it, the seed has been planted for when you are ready. 

A huge thank you to Rebecca Foden and Andrea Gamson for the tips and advice on mentoring. If you’d like to reach out to either you can do so through the sistr platform or have a listen to hear the webinar in full on sistr’s YouTube platform. 

The post Building Your Mentoring Dream Team – Why Have a Mentor? appeared first on Sistr Blog.

sistr had the honour of being joined by some truly inspirational women during International Women’s Week. They all choose to challenge in their own ways and we’ve taken some snippets from each of our webinars to offer some advice and motivational tips from women who are tackling life from all sorts of different angles! 

Tonia, Antigoni & Sophia Buxton

With multiple experiences between them ranging from singing to finance to teaching to nutrition here are some powerful quotes from this formidable trio to help you when you choose to challenge.

“You need to choose to challenge in order to feel fulfilled”.

“Sometimes in life you reach a point that you’re so challenged that the fear kicks in in a way that could stop you. That’s when you’ve got to take the jump and stand on your own two feet”.

“Sometimes leaning on someone keeps you in a comfort zone and you’ve got to branch out. Win or lose it’s then on me”

“You’ve got to make sure you’ve got the right tribe of women around you to take on the world”.

“As women a lot of the time our energy as women is going out to nurturing others. Sometimes we need to be selfish and nurture ourselves”.

Farah Kabir & Sarah Welsh, Founders of HANX

HANX is a sexual and intimate wellness brand designed with women in mind. The brand covers products from your first time to your first child. Farah and Sarah felt that condoms were promoting a man’s conquest, they weren’t discreet.  They set out to challenge the status quo and create condoms for women and to change the rhetoric around sex and the terminology. 

Women have never felt empowered to take control of their sexual health and HANX’s mission is to allow women to approach sexual health and sex products from a position of power and normalisation. Their belief is that you should feel good about protecting yourself against STDs and feel proud about wanting to champion your own sexual health. 

Times have changed since HANX raised investment. It felt like a male dominated industry but this is changing. People’s mindset towards sexual wellness is widening and becoming more accepting. People realise they can take control over other aspects of their health such as vaginal health. HANX look to create a platform for women to be able to amplify their voice. 

“Take the risk. You’ll regret not trying. Take the leap because you’ll never fully know what you’re letting yourself in for!”

Harriet Minter, Host of Badass Woman’s Show on TalkRadio. Author of WFH, How to Build a Career You Love When You’re Not in the Office. 

Harriet has spent lockdown writing a book about working from home (amongst other things!) and challenging the stigma around productivity and the idea that we ‘should’ be in the office. 

Her advice around working from home is that firstly, it’s more than achievable to be as productive at home – if not more productive – as you are in the office. 

Ask yourself when do you work best? Set some clear boundaries around that. Stick to the time you work best and be rigid. Understand why it’s important – when you regularly work more than 40hrs a week you crash your productivity. If you work more than that you aren’t necessarily getting more done. 

When you regularly work those hours productivity decreases over time. This can lead to stress and a toll on your body. Take a step back and say the most important person in my working world is me and I need to look after me. 

Harriet’s advice for this year is pick a belief and actively pursue it. Choose to challenge yourself with your belief. Let yourself be open to being wrong but allow yourself to try. 

“When you see the women in your life looking like it’s become too much, choose to challenge the thing that’s making it look too much for them. Be the person that says, this isn’t cool, we’re going to change it.”

Molly Kingsely – Children’s campaigner and Founder of UsForThem.

UsForThem was established in response to a concern for children’s welfare during the pandemic. Molly felt strongly that children had not been considered in the Government’s response to COVID-19. 

Molly maintains that lockdown was never the issue, it was purely child welfare. She saw a photo in the news of children in France sitting in chalk-marked boxes in the playground, wrote a blog about how wrong it was and hasn’t looked back since. 

What keeps Molly going in the face of adversity?

We can tell you Molly absolutely faces adversity! Children at school is a hugely topical discussion area.. Molly’s drive has always been that the voice of children and subsequently their welfare was sidelined and with that always at the forefront of her mind, she’s been able to dig deep, rise above the criticism and keep focused. When you believe in something strongly, when it matches your values so closely that it’s all consuming it becomes bigger than you and that energy sustains you even when the challenge feels like it’s too big.

Philippa Roberts & Jane Cunningham, Author of Brandsplaining & Founders of PLH

Philippa and Jane wrote their first book 15 years ago where, both working in Marketing, they noticed the treatment of female brands was very different to the treatment of male brands. The duo decided there had to be a better way of dealing with female clients and chose to challenge the entire industry

Over the course of 15 years there’s been a massive change in the female audience such as MeToo. Philippa and Jane felt there was an opportunity to look at marketing and see if it’s moved on over the last 15 years and if it hasn’t, why hasn’t it? Their goal is to address how marketing could be moved on and get rid of the diminishing behaviour we still see in marketing. 

“When you remove the male gaze on a brand it’ll come out a lot more relevant and a lot more interesting”.

“Men are taught to show that they know, not show that they don’t know. Which is seen in the way they do business. It’s easy to talk down to a woman”.

“Ask, listen and hear women when they’re talking about their aspirations.”

If you’d like to watch any of our chats again then head over to our sistr YouTube Channel!

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What are gender issues and biases?

Bias exists in every facet of our daily lives. It’s impossible to escape it and we try to categorise things that occur in order to make sense of things. Biases however, lead us to form prejudiced opinions against others which in turn creates inequalities between different demographics. 

Gender bias is a form of discrimation. It occurs against women more often than not, when their behaviours and beliefs reflect the values of the men who created the particular setting they’re in ie the workplace. There are so many varying factors that can influence gender roles such as society, family, social media.  There are also practices that can be put into place to reduce gender bias with the aim of creating a more diverse and inclusive workplace. 

What does gender bias mean?

Gender bias refers to the tendency to prefer a certain gender over another. Its seen as an unconscious bias whereby an individual will subconsciously link stereotypes to a group of people or person. This behaviour then shapes how that individual can connect with and understand others. 

In today’s workplace, gender bias is commonplace when referring to the preferential treatment of men – in particular, white, hetrosexual males. ‘Sexism’ is the more widespread term that is used whereby women are discriminate against on the basis of their sex. 

There are a number of other types of unconscious bias that can occur in addition to gender bias:

• Performance support bias: when more resources and support are available to one gender over another.
• Performance review bias: when despite being merit-based, evaluations are carried out differently between one gender and another. 
• Performance reward bias: when rewards such as promotions, pay rises are rewarded differently between one gender and another. 
• Glass ceiling: an accumulation of all these biases has led to the creation of a glass ceiling. This refers to the inability of minorities and/or women (in the most part) to be unable to rise up the professional ranks. 

Let’s take a look at some stats around gender bias in the workplace.

• 42% of women experience gender discrimination at work.
• 5 of the top 14 barriers women face are related to gender bias.
• Women are 25-46% more likely to be hired with blind applications.
• Both men and women are twice as likely to hire a male candidate.
• 40% of men and women notice a double standard against female candidates.
• 23% of women are CEOs.
• Men view unconscious bias as the number one barrier for women in their careers. 
• Women receive pay rises 5% less often than men. 

And here’s some of the more common gender bias examples in the workplace.

• Recruiting strategies: both men and women are twice as likely to hire a man over a woman. 
• Job descriptions: language can carry gendered associations so how descriptions are worded can appeal to one gender more than the other. 
• Interview questions: if an interview is not standardised, the questions can be formed around personality, experience and gender. 
• Professional development and career advancement: as mentioned, the glass ceiling effect can have a significant impact on career progression. 
• Compensation and rewards: the gender pay gap ranges between men and women from 3% to a whopping 51%!
• Parental status: for working mothers discrepancies in pay, benefits and expectations are even broader for working mothers. 

How Can You Reduce Gender Bias in the Workplace?

There are so many ways in which we can all be accountable and make an effort to recognise and act on gender bias. Here are a few that are supported by the collection of stats which can often make it easier to turn the unconscious into the conscious.

• Collect and look at bonus/compensation data. 
• Collect and look at demographic data of employees.
• Run surveys specific to your team.
• Analyse your recruiting process and recognise gender bias in language.
• Use Artifical Intelligence in your recruiting process. Is the decision reached through AI the same as the one you’d have ended up at?
• Introduce gender bias training.
• Offer perks and benefits that appeal to all and have been commented on by all.
• Review your physical office space and make sure there are no biases within the office environment. 
• Look at your Boardroom and diversify it. Is your Board primarily one gender? If it is, change it. 

Our sistr panel on Smashing Gender Bias saw a fascinating debate between some phenomenal sistrs from backgrounds far and wide. Each sistr had their own unique standpoint, experience and views on gender bias, its prevalence and how to smash it. Have a listen to the webinar and listen to their views and opinions.  Here’s a few powerful, take-home quotes from their discussion. As ever, we’re hugely grateful to our formidable panel guests for giving their time to sistr.

Jackie Adedeji – Podcaster, Journalist, Spokesperson.

“ We need to amplify and speak up. It’s not going to be easy. Put defensiveness to the side, it’s not an attack to have an opinion, we’re fighting the same system. We need to open doors and open rooms and collaborate to bring people into the same space. Make your voice matter everywhere you do”.

Cynthia Fortlage – 2SLGBTQIA+ Coach & Consultant.

“ We need to have the awareness that everyone has to challenge your own privilege. When you realise you have privilege you can create spaces and uplift others to speak for themselves. My job isn’t to speak for them, it’s to create the space for them to speak. See humans first, not the differences”.

Amy Kean – Diversity & Inclusion Consultant.

“There are topics that are obvious to change such as gender and race and there are topics that are harder to see to change such as neurodiversity and disability. We need to work to create spaces that cater for the visible and invisible biases and where one is often ignored, we need to make a plan to tackle it”.

Julia Elliott Brown – Investment Expert.

“The danger of echo chambers is that we’re talking to people who understand already and are like-minded. We need to educate the ones who cannot recognise bias or, who are choosing not to acknowledge it.”

The post Smashing Gender Bias appeared first on Sistr Blog.

When the stakes are down, what do you do? How do you respond? One thing that I’ve learnt over the years – and something I would absolutely go back and tell my 20 year old self – is that we are so much stronger than we know. In the face of adversity, we are capable of so much more than we give ourselves credit for. It is all too easy in life to shy away from something, to shun the uncomfortable situation, to walk away when we think we might make a mistake. Then follows the feeling of inadequacy, the frustrations at not giving something a go. Imagine finding the acknowledgement that it doesn’t have to be like that. Imagine finding a way to step through our fears. What a wonderful world of opportunity we’d then exist in! 

Sistr had the honour of speaking to 3 badass women in their respective fields who have shown up, risen up and found methods to become their own biggest cheerleaders. 

Marilyn Okoro – Triple Olympian – a British track and field athlete. She finished third in the 800 metres at both the 2007 and 2008 IAAF World Athletics Final. She was on the bronze winning 4 × 400 m relay at the 2007 World Championships in Athletics. COO Global Sports Management Services, Advocate, Speaker, Transition and Wellness Coach. 

Marilyn, a celebrated Olympian, made the decision to stop competing on November 31st 2020. Once the final curtain call had been made, Marilyn started out on a mission to revolutionise the culture of sport. Athletes walk away from the world of sport looking for something that will give them the same sense of purpose, the same drive. And yet, the world of Sport just isn’t preparing athletes early enough for their departure. When the race ends, when the final competition has come to an end, what then? 

Marilyn’s departure has so far been incredibly liberating as she seeks to educate and mentor other women. Her top tips for backing yourself are both powerful and adaptable to any profession, any situation, any industry. 

• Ignore common ‘perceptions’ of how you’re supposed to look and behave. The athletics world is male dominated, Marilyn was a middle distance athlete and yet looked like a sprinter. She was told to change. She didn’t. Her advice is to accept that you are a ‘real’ role model. There are so many misconceptions about how to train and Marilyn’s training was never from a ‘female’ place. She soon got used to being an anomaly. 
• Be a visual representation of strength. As a public figure eyes are on you. If there’s someone watching who can see themselves in you and relate to an aspect of you, be it your physical appearance, your upbringing, your approach to training, then that is something so very powerful. Use the power to project strength and positivity onto others. 
• Talk yourself up as often and as much as you need. Marilyn stands in front of the mirror on a daily basis repeating affirmations over and over until she believes them. Make yourself love your body to achieve your goals. 
• Develop a champion mindset. Know that fear isn’t a reality and be willing to pull it all together. What’s the reality here? Have you trained properly? Have you learnt what you needed to learn? Have you prepared to the best of your ability? Tell yourself that you chose to be where you are.
• Don’t measure life on ‘medals’, measure it on the journey and the legacy. In sport, realistically there is only ever one winner so the odds are stacked against you from the start. So define what success is to you on any given day. Winners don’t always come in first place. 
• Have a solid tribe around you. Find the tribe whose opinion matters to you and who are going to shape your life in some way. If it doesn’t serve you then park it. Be intentional as to who you allow into your space. 
• Know that you are enough. 

Naomi Schiff – a Belgian and Rwandan racer who was born in Belgium but grew up in South Africa. She now lives in Germany and races under the German flag. Naomi’s career highlights include finishing second in the ADAC Zurich 24h Nürburgring Race in 2018 and winning the Clio Cup China Series in 2014. Diversity and Inclusion Ambassador at W Series. 

Naomi’s entry into racing wasn’t through the perceived route of a parent pushing their child into a particular field. It was in fact by mistake. Attending a birthday party at a Go-Kart track, Naomi discovered she was good, very good at racing. 

Naomi’s drive in life is the recognition that there will be a lot of young girls watching her moves. The voice in her head serves as a reminder that these young girls look up to her. For some, this would translate into pressure, a duty-like feeling to perform. For Naomi, it ignites the fire in her belly; what she does, she does for the aspiring racing drivers, the ambitious young girls who seek out a role model, as Marilyn referred, a ‘visual representation of strength’. 

How does Naomi back herself when the stakes are high? When her career isn’t going to plan what tools does she use to talk herself up?

• Charge the fear narrative. Naomi spent time with a sports psychologist when she was younger who told her the symptoms of fear are similar to those of adrenalin. It’s all a mindset so change the narrative. Fear is information and you can’t give it power. Performance is linked to confidence so give yourself confidence by telling yourself it’s not fear, but your adrenaline kicking in and you’ll use this adrenalin to channel your power. 
• Promote yourself to yourself. ‘Make’ yourself believe in yourself; there is no other bigger cheerleader than yourself so why not champion yourself. 
• Line your ducks up. And by this Naomi means do all the hard work, the preparation, the practise. If you do all this, when the criticism comes from whatever angle, you can hold your hand up high, and say you’ve done everything in your power to prepare for the challenge. 
• Find your North Star. What is your reason for success? Define it and live by it. Every. Single. Day. 
• Accept the bad moments are character building. Accepting the failure will allow you to see the best in every situation no matter the consequence. Sit down and have a chat with your ‘failure’, look at it, process it, learn from it and move on. You’ll wake up stronger and more conscious of yourself and your purpose. 

Dani Wallace – Queen Bee, Founder of Fly Anyway Foundation, Show Up, Wise Up, Rise Up, Public Speaking Coach, Motivational Coach & Mentor, Gratitude Obsessive! 

There’s always been a performer in Dani since the age of 14 years old when she travelled the world on stage.  And yet Dani explains that people misconstrued extroversion for confidence. Her ‘go-to’ was to seek validation from outside of herself as inside, there was nothing. Dani is a survivor of domestic abuse and homelessness and yet has overcome the odds to build a phenomenal business that is all about building confidence and backing yourself. 

How has Dani broken the generational and cultural cycles that have framed her family? How has Dani found the voice to show up, wise up and rise up?

• Look at the future version of you. Who do you want to become? Who do you want to inspire and make an impression on? Look at that person and love who they are and what they embody. 
• Don’t let down the past you. Acknowledge the things that you weren’t showing up in yourself, learn from them and then show up in your own Arena. 
• Own yourself as a woman. Whether you’re having a day where you feel like you need to masculinise yourself or a day where you draw on your femine side or whether you don’t know or care which way you’re falling, you don’t need to pinpoint where your femininity sits. Just accept yourself as a woman in whatever form or in whatever space your energy sits. 
• Own your boundaries within your relationship. Be it with your partner, family, friends, colleagues, know what you are comfortable talking about and own it. Be it talking about money or, sex, missions or, dreams, define your own boundaries and hold no shame or fear in being able to define them to others. 
• Acknowledge the power of the ripple effect. Dani has learnt that by opening her mouth, building her business, coaching her clients, everything has a ripple effect. She opens her mouth and it’s powerful. In acknowledging the power behind the voice, it enables others to share their voices and make an impact. The impact can break cycles and the power in that knows no limit. 
• Hear both voices in your head. The first voice we all hear is the loudest voice. The inner critic that despite coming across as negative, just wants to keep you safe and alive. That voice is not open to another level of conversation because it doesn’t know or want to acknowledge another level of success. It merely serves to protect you. Dani says have a chat with this voice and reach out to the quieter voice that’s whispering ‘take the risk’. Say “thank you for keeping me safe however, now i’m going to lean into the quieter voice because i’m curious”. Get curious and ask questions. “Is what I want to do safe, is it logical, is it going to serve me?” If the answer is yes then listen to that quieter voice and crack on. 

Let’s face it, none of us are born with an immunity to fear or self-doubt. Importantly though, we all have the ability to learn and teach ourselves how to navigate the fear and self doubt. Have faith in your capacity and ability to tackle problems as they come along. In doing so, it will allow you to pursue new challenges that lead to a deeper sense of purpose in your life. You don’t need a detailed plan, just trust in yourself that you’ll figure it out. Don’t dwell in a circle where your potential is restricted, challenge yourself to trust that you have all the powers to deal with challenges, all the resources to face new challenges and as such, expand the possibilities that come your way. 

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Imposter Syndrome is a phrase that is prevalent today. It’s the phrase we all relate to but sometimes don’t admit to. Is it as stifling as we make out or has it become a label? An excuse to justify why we’re not where we want to be?

Sistr was joined this week by 3 experts in their fields who discuss their knowledge and experience of imposter syndrome. 

Zoe Clews – Founder and Hypnotherapist at Zoe Clews & Associates.

Sarah Porter – Founder and CEO, InspiredMinds and World Summit AI.

Sangeeta Pillai – Founder of Soul Sutras. 

A psychological pattern in which an individual doubts their skills, talents or accomplishments and has a persistent internalised fear of being exposed as a “fraud”. Despite external evidence of their competence, those experiencing this phenomenon remain convinced that they are frauds, and do not deserve all they have achieved. Individuals with imposterism incorrectly attribute their success to luck, or interpret it as a result of deceiving others into thinking they are more intelligent than they perceive themselves to be. While early research focused on the prevalence among high-achieving women, imposter syndrome has been recognised to affect both men and women equally. (Wikipedia)

Zoe explains that imposter syndrome is rife and coming to the surface more and more. The more successful you become, the worse it can be. What you feel inside can be so very different to what you project on the outside. 

Let’s take it right back to birth. We are born blank slates. And yet, often through no fault of our own we go through negative experiences, some more severe than others. Trauma can be anything, no matter how big or small. Perhaps it’s a one-off episode or prolonged bullying, heartbreak, not being fully met emotionally by parents, failure at something? We also go through adverse experiences as an adult. 

If we go through these negative experiences up to the age of 9, we split off from who we are. This creates the ‘collapsed self’, a state in which an individual’s sense of self is reduced “to the confines of a particular set of largely implicit and automatic beliefs about self and others and the behaviours that ordinarily express them” (Bertram D. Cohen, Ph.D).  This is us at our most vulnerable and the full complexity and richness of self in everyday life is lost during the collapse.  

The collapsed self turns to feelings of ‘I’m not good enough’, ‘I’m unworthy’, ‘I must be defective’. At this moment the super ego or inner critic rears its head. We find ourselves in a position of comparison. ‘Why is my life not as good as theirs?’ ‘Why am I not as successful as them?’ Social media plays a huge part in the vicious comparison cycle. 

The collapsed self is full of shame, self doubt, a desire to want to hide authentic feelings from others. We don’t want society to see the full picture so we put on a mask. The pressure to be perfect becomes overwhelming so the mask goes on and the message of “I’m going to be perfect and successful” is the message seen by the outside world. It is this face – the masked face – that the outside world responds to. 

The masked face shows a successful, polished, confident, in control individual striving for greatness. The outside world will believe in the masked face, you’ll be received with positive regard, no consideration will be made for what actually goes on behind the mask. And this is where imposter syndrome steps in – we are responding to life with what we feel inside; people are responding to us with what they see on the outside. 

Sarah refers to imposter syndrome being prevalent in both herself and her industry. As the only female Board member in a tech company, Sarah was always in the minority peer group. It was easy to make comparisons with others and conclude that she didn’t belong. Stereotyping was a common occurrence which would fuel the already niggling doubts in her head about her place in a male-dominated tech world. After falling out with a company, Sarah decided that if she couldn’t change the system, she’d create a system that exemplified what the ethos and standpoint of the tech world should be; an equal arena, a level playing field. 

“You don’t belong here” is a phrase that still haunts Sarah and yet she has adopted coping mechanisms and methods to calm the inner critic. 

Sangeeta’s experience of imposter syndrome can, she says, be attributed to both personal and cultural factors. Sangeeta grew up in the slums of Mumbai with an alcoholic father and an abusive childhood. Her feelings of unworthiness are prevalent, as a South Asian woman, you are simply not allowed a voice. It was her ‘cultural baggage’ that inspired Sangeeta to set up Soul Sutras, a platform that allows “all bad betis and besharam bibis” to express themselves openly, freely and without shame or fear. Her platform seeks to smash the taboos of topics such as sex, periods, mental health, a space to openly tell the story you want to tell. 

How do we hack imposter syndrome? What methods can we turn to to smash the voice out of our heads?

Acknowledge and know that we have parts of ourselves that aren’t perfect. And that’s ok. They are feelings, not beliefs and it’s ok to be vulnerable. It’s easy to retreat into a mindset of ‘I’ve got to be perfect’ and this propels us into thinking we need to achieve more and more. Zoe refers to integration and understanding as being a huge part of the healing process. Accept that it’s ok not to be perfect, it’s simply not possible to be perfect. 

Work through negative trauma. The subconscious doesn’t understand time. It doesn’t grasp the concept that if something happened 20 years ago we should by now, have recovered from it. The beliefs we came to of ourselves still stand and affect what we do so it may be important to address them. Heal what we’ve gone through. Realise that when you’re in a collapsed place, you don’t have to rush back to feeling good. 

Acknowledge what you’ve achieved. When the inner critic pops up questioning your validity, challenging your worthiness, write down all your achievements. Write down everything and read it to that inner voice. It’ll soon pipe down. 

Recognise when the inner critic pipes up. Some label it, Sarah calls it her ‘inner claw’. Face it head on and ask it what’s the worst that can happen. Create a fear setting whereby you play out in your mind what could possibly go wrong. And then ask yourself, is the worst really that bad? Then face that inner voice head on and give it a talking to, get angry with it, talk it down, smash it out of the park. And as Zoe says, tell it:

Not today Satan! F*ck off! 

Visualise your environment, the environment that you’re doubting and fearful of. If you’re heading to a conference with thousands of delegates or a meeting with 1 other person, the environment can be equally petrifying. Visualise what music you’ll have playing if you’re walking onto a stage. What will the coffee taste like when you’re sitting in your meeting? What do you think the look on people’s faces will be when you are presenting? Knuckle down into the detail and it’ll transport you into the smaller, but equally important details. 

Have a cup of tea with your feelings. If a friend came to you feeling rubbish, you’d make them a cuppa, chat through their fears and offer them words of wisdom. Do this with yourself. Make yourself a cup of tea, sit down and give yourself a break. Pep talk yourself up and self-parent. What would you be saying to your child/friend? Say it to yourself loud and clear. 

Distinguish between whether challenges thrown at you by others are challenges you genuinely need to listen to, acknowledge and act on, or whether you are merely challenging them and their mindset. Take a step back and look at your purpose. Step away from yourself as an individual and ask yourself why you’re doing what you’re doing. The more visible you are, the more criticism you’ll receive. But tell yourself this; you’ve chosen a path to make an impact, to create purpose, to inspire a vision. Give yourself permission to be powerful and your voice will allow and inspire others to find theirs. 

Imposter Syndrome – so very pertinent, so very real and so very common. But let’s collectively try and overcome this together. Let’s be our own biggest cheerleader. Let’s be each other’s biggest cheerleaders. So go forth. Follow your intuition, embrace your dream, believe in yourself and fly with the wind because life is for living.

The post Imposter Syndrome: Why We Have It & How to Hack It appeared first on Sistr Blog.

Have you noticed a change in your eating and drinking habits? Are you binge watching Netflix? Can you relate to any of these statements? 

I’m drinking wine every night. 

I’m eating more carbs. 

My biscuit tin is bulging at the seams and yet I’m always refilling it. 

I check the fridge every 10 minutes looking for the answer to all my problems.

I’ve run out of programmes to watch on Netflix having watched all of them.

If any of that rings true, fear not! You are not alone! It’s referred to as ‘emotional eating’ (yes, even the Netflix bit!). It’s more common than you think, it’s not a sin and it’s a perfectly natural reaction to the ups and downs of life. 

So what is emotional eating and what can we do about it? 

Sistr spoke to Wellbeing Coach Nati Tarjanyi about the potential triggers and tips to break the negative cycles. 

Let’s look at it as a habit whereby our emotions are driving our eating (or drinking) habits. We seek comfort in food when we’re feeling low. We do this to suppress negative feelings. In doing so it’s more common than not to create a negative cycle whereby we then feel guilt or shame after eating this way. 

What drives someone to eat because of emotions? 

In short, anything. Work, family, relationships, health issues, it doesn’t take much to make us turn to comfort food. We are harbouring trapped emotions with limited self belief and we want a quick fix. Emotional hunger then kicks in and overtakes our rational thought and best intentions. 

Why do we turn to food? 

Negative emotions can create emotional voids. Food can be one of the easiest ways to fill that void and in turn create a false feeling of being fulfilled. Lockdown has presented us with other factors that can trigger emotional eating:

• Lack of social support network.
• Inability to turn to activities that might normally relieve stress and anxiety.
• Negative self-belief and self-worth.
• Boredom – either too much time on our hands or not enough to think about eating properly – possibly both scenarios combined.
• Primal behaviour kicks in. We are in survival mode and nourishment of the body is a basic primal urge to survive.
• Changing dopamine levels in response to stress.

Dopamine is a neurotransmitter made by our body. Our nervous system uses it to send messages between nerve cells. It is our chemical messenger and plays a huge role in how we feel pleasure. The quickest and easiest method to derive pleasure, especially at this time, is through food when other avenues (socialising/dating/gyms etc) have been taken away. Our bodies will naturally crave the most energy efficient food to survive. Cooking a steak and eating an apple for pudding will produce dopamine but nowhere near as effectively as a bar of chocolate.

What is the difference between emotional hunger and true hunger?

We need to eat to survive so it may seem tricky to distinguish the difference between emotional hunger and true hunger. Perhaps you don’t want to distinguish the difference? Or you know the difference but are happy to brush over it for the moment? Either option is fine but here’s a few pointers if you’re looking to go deeper into your emotional eating.

• Physical hunger develops over time vs. emotional hunger comes on suddenly.
• Physical hunger sees you want a variety in what you eat vs. emotional hunger sees a craving for a particular thing. 
• Physical hunger, once you’ve eaten, will produce a feeling of fullness which stops you eating more vs. emotional hunger comes with binge eating and a lack of fullness.
• Physical hunger will not carry with it any negative feelings towards eating vs. emotional eating is accompanied by feelings of guilt and/or shame.

What can we do to stop emotional eating?

Stop! Pause and become self aware. Slow down the process and take a step back. Question why you’re doing it? 

Identify the reason behind what you are eating for?

It’s all too easy to get a quick fix with emotional eating but more often than not, eating due to negative emotions can lead to a deeper sense of unhappiness. The cycle needs to be broken and the emotional needs addressed. 

One of the first steps to take is try and identify the differences between physical hunger and emotional hunger. Focus on how your hunger has come about and when it started and how you’re feeling both physically and mentally after eating. 

Find another coping method. 

Identify the need for food and label the emotion. The moment you label something it loses its power. You are aware. You are in charge. You are now an observer of your emotion. Look at your emotion with compassion. How would you deal with a child showing the same negative feelings? You’d wrap them in compassion, inject some positivity and show them a way out. Do the same for yourself.

Move your body and your mindset.

Can you find another method to deal with the stress? Writing a diary, going for a walk, doing an exercise class, popping on some tunes and having a kitchen dance are all possible ideas. It can take time to shift a mindset and , change a behavioural pattern, so play around with a few ideas and see what works for you. 

Practise positive self-talk.

Ask yourself why am I behaving like this? What has triggered me to reach for the biscuit tin or the wine in the last hour/day? Emotional eating can walk hand in hand with guilt and shame so it’s vital to show yourself compassion and talk yourself round. 

Life is unprecedented at the moment. We’re technically living in a warzone-like existence except we can’t fight the enemy. We can’t direct all our frustrations towards a physical foe, it simply doesn’t exist. So we turn our frustrations inwards. Don’t do this. 

Don’t punish yourself. Don’t personalise it. Don’t see it as a failure. It’s a mere blip in the road and you can use it as an opportunity to learn and grow from it. 

Ask for help.

It’s all too easy to bury our heads especially when isolated – both physically and mentally. 2020 has certainly shown us that we need to be more open and honest and authentic to our true selves. It is FINE to say you’re struggling, more than ok to admit you’re not happy and over and above courageous to ask for help. 

Start with friends and family, put in a phone call and let them know how you’re feeling. You’d be surprised at how, just by reaching out and saying the words ‘I’m not doing so well’ might trigger the emotional support you need. 

If that doesn’t work there are professional groups such as Overeaters Anonymous or your GP can refer you onto a counsellor. If you’d like to try closer to home then reach out to us at sistr and the amazing Nati can have a chat with you.

This may not be the right time to change your behaviour and that’s ok. But if you’re not happy with your behaviour, take positive steps to change it. Don’t change it because you think you ‘should’. Change it because you ‘want’ to. Make sure you’re ready to change and then get out there and smash it with some self compassion and kindness. And a whole lot of support from your fellow sistrs!

The post Emotional Eating: What You Need to Know appeared first on Sistr Blog.

Hands up if you’re frustrated! 

Do you sometimes feel like your team isn’t responding in a way that you expect? Do you feel like you are never quite on the same page as your boss? Frustrated by lack of understanding? Are your emails to colleagues and clients going unanswered? Is your voice just not being heard?

No matter what industry you’re in, no matter what position you’re in, the term ‘communication’ can throw up a minefield of behaviours, interpretations and frustrations. Far too often, we assume everyone communicates, behaves and acts the same way as us. Worse still, we place an expectation on them to adapt their behaviour to our line of thinking. 

Let’s imagine a scenario whereby every leader and to an extent, every employee, stopped for a second, took a breathe and said: 

“It’s not about me”. 

Imagine a scenario whereby everyone understood the importance of placing others at the forefront. Imagine a scenario whereby approaches were driven by a service mindset, a set of power skills that enabled us to improve on our own communication and as such establish connections based on trust and respect. 

So how can you adopt the words ‘it’s not about me’ and use them to improve communication and subsequently connect better?

Learn to Listen

“We have two ears and one mouth so that we can listen twice as much as we speak”.

 – Epictetus

The best way to get to know someone is to listen. Properly listen. Communication and connection is ineffective unless you know that person. So listen. By listening, I’m not referring to allowing them to gas for hours, I mean actually listen in order to understand them. It’s easy to jump the gun and read in between the lines before reading the actual lines. It’s easy to form an opinion based on what you think they’re saying in between the lines. Listen to the actual lines. Focus on their words and the manner in which they’re speaking the lines. 

Listen more and talk less. Allowing yourself to be open-minded rather than forming opinions and judgments could, potentially present you with new ideas as well as picking up on issues before they multiply in size. 

Understand body language

“Effective communication is 20% what you know and 80% how you feel about what you know”. 

– Jim Rohn

So much can be said through body language rather than spoken words. Studies show that 55% of communication is done through body language, 38% is tone of voice and only 7% is actual words spoken. 

Imagine if you could unravel someone’s posture, mannerisms and hand gestures how much it would tell you about the person you’re trying to connect and communicate with. Take a moment to try and zone into this. It’s a little tricky in the world of Zoom calls but even watching hand gestures and eye contact can tell you a lot about a person. If you detect nervousness, give them some breathing space. Even go so far as to do some research on the mannerism and try to understand it better. In doing so you’ll form a better understanding of the person and as such can adapt your approach to them. A small tweak in your mindset could lead to a huge spike in their positivity.

Cultivate self-awareness

“It takes considerable knowledge just to realise the extent of your own ignorance”. 

– Thomas Sowell

If you want to ensure you can place yourself in the best possible position to advance through your career or lead effectively at the top, you need to cultivate awareness. Awareness not just of yourself but of others and situations too. 

Self-awareness is understanding your own strengths, weaknesses, emotions, motivations and what you believe in and stand for. Of overriding importance, is also understanding how your behaviour and energy affects others. Everything links. Everything is connected. How you interact with others, how they see you, how you see them, how you react to situations – it’s all connected and self-awareness can enhance these connections. 

Awareness of others is easy to sideline. You’re busy and multi-tasking, possibly jumping across multiple  priorities. You need to stop and give someone your undivided attention. Don’t crash through them like a steam train. Allow them the space to ask questions, listen to understand and by doing so, your communication and connection will improve. 

Situational awareness calls on your ability to perceive what’s going on in the present or the future. The more you can look up and observe, the better you can see and deal with the present and the future. Look down and you’ll exist in constant crisis management with limited communication and connections. 

Be your authentic self & speak with honesty.

“The single biggest problem in communication is the illusion that it has taken place”.

 – George Bernard Shaw

As tough as it might be, learn to agree to disagree with others. Be who you really are and allow yourself to communicate in a straightforward way. It is absolutely acceptable to have a different opinion to someone else without disliking each other. Learning to listen to another opinion and respect it even if you don’t agree with it is one of life’s greatest talents. So allow yourself to truly own up to what you want to say and then say it. 

Follow the belief that honesty is indeed the best policy. Perhaps they don’t agree with you or your words don’t make an impression, but your honesty will. And, it’s your honesty that might form that connection. You won’t feel like you truly belong somewhere if you are not being honest. 

Be empathetic 

“To effectively communicate, we must realise that we are all different in the way we perceive the world and use this understanding as a guide to our communication with others”. 

– Tony Robbins

Put yourself in someone else’s shoes and try to see the situation from their perspective. This is so important now as we juggle homeschooling, anxiety and so many ‘abnormal’ external factors. Could their personal circumstances be impacting their approach? Have you explained yourself succinctly and what you actually want from that person? Is your brief as clear as it could possibly be? To be an empathetic leader, you need to change your own mindset to allow yourself to put other people first. 

People are human beings. They are not a means to an end. Everyone has a story and everyone’s story impacts their performance. Put yourself in their shoes and read their story. Give them the benefit of the doubt, check in with them because you want to not because you have to. By understanding them better, you’ll create stronger foundations from which successful communication will grow. 

It’s always fascinating how few people ask questions. It costs nothing to ask a question and in doing so, you’ll draw out feelings and implications through the answers. Curious people who ask lots of questions have a far greater understanding of people around them. In information gathering, curious people are able to build stronger rapports and as such, deeper connections. 

Life is full of communication. Our ability to communicate has a direct impact on all we do and all who we form connections with. John Maxwell wrote in his book Everyone Communicates Few Connect that “people cannot succeed in life without communicating effectively”. So very obvious but so very true. Understanding the impact of how we communicate and what we are communicating is vital to ensuring an end goal is achieved. 

Not everyone communicates the same, but we do all communicate. So if you’re looking to build connections both with existing and new faces, then communicate effectively. If these connections aren’t happening, then ask yourself this: Are you making the connections you want? If you’re not, then why not? If you are, then why have they happened? Are you communicating in the most impactful way you can?

The post Connection Through Communication appeared first on Sistr Blog.

Turmeric seems to be popping up a lot in our sistr chats! So we thought we’d unravel a bit of info on its benefits so you can all get cracking with it and pop it in your lattes.

Medics, nutritionists, and all others who seem to be in the know have referred to turmeric as the most effective nutritional supplement in existence. We’ll take their word and happily run with it.

Studies have shown it has major benefits for your body and brain. Let’s have a look at how and why we should all embrace it into our daily routine. 

• Turmeric Contains Bioactive Compounds with Medicinal Properties

Turmeric’s common use is the spice that gives curry its yellow colour. India has embraced this spice for thousands of years both as a spice and for its compounds with medicinal properties. 

The compounds are called curcuminoids of which curcumin is the most important and the main active ingredient in turmeric. Its powers lie within its use as a powerful anti-inflammatory and antioxidant.

• Curcumin is a Natural Anti-Inflammatory Compound

Inflammation helps your body fight foreign bodies as well as repairing damage. In absence of inflammation, pathogens would envelop your body and eventually kill you. So whilst short term inflammation can be beneficial, the long term becomes chronic. Anything that can help in the fight against chronic inflammation, especially natural remedies is important. 

Curcumin has been proved in some instances to match the effectiveness of some anti-inflammatory drugs by suppressing many molecules that contribute to inflammation, without the side effects.  Conditions such as arthritis, a common condition involving inflammation of the joints have sown that curcumin has proved an effective anti-inflammtory. 

• Turmeric Boosts Brain-Derived Neurotrophic Factor, Linked to Improved Brain Function and Lower Risk of Brain Diseases

Brain neurons can form new connections as well as in some areas of the brain, multiply and increase in number. One of the main drivers behind the process is a brain-derived neurotrophic factor (BDNF), a type of growth hormone in your brain. Brain disorders can commonly be linked to decreased levels of this hormone. 

Curcumin has been known to increase levels of BDNF. This could be seen as an effective process to delay age-related decreases in brain function.

• Curcumin Should Lower Your Risk of Heart Disease

Heart disease is the number 1 cause of death in the world. Whilst there are so many contributing factors to the disease, curcumin may help reverse steps in the process. 

• Turmeric Can Help Prevent Cancer

Whilst there are many forms of Cancer, it is characterised by uncontrolled cell growth and some forms have many things in common. Curcumin supplements appear to have some effect on some forms of Cancer. It’s been shown to contribute to the death of cancerous cells affecting the growth, development, and spear at the molecular level. 

Whilst curcumin hasn’t been embraced as a conventional cancer treatment as yet, there is evidence that it may prevent it from occurring in the first place and its inclusion as a future treatment is looking promising.

• Curcumin has Benefits Against Depression

Curcumin can act as effectively as an antidepressant. A study conducted amongst a group of 60 suffering from depression showed that curcumin acted as effectively as Prozac in helping with symptoms. 

How Should You Consume Turmeric?

Its recommended that you take it as a supplement or use it as a spice. Here are a few tips if you’re taking it as a supplement.

1. Look for “phytosome technology” on the label – this type of curcumin has 29 times greater absorption in the body compared to standard extracts.
2. Check your dose – doctors would recommend taking 500 milligrams twice a day with food. 
3. Start low and build up – as with everything new, let your tummy adapt!
4. Be picky – find a supplement with as few inactive ingredients as possible. 
5. Listen to your body – turmeric may cause bloating so stop taking it if you notice negative side effects. 

Here’s Our Recipe for the Perfect Turmeric Latte!

Ingredients:

350ml almond milk (or milk of your choice)

¼ tsp ground turmeric

¼ tsp ground cinnamon

¼ tsp ground ginger

½ tsp vanilla extract

1 tsp maple syrup

Grind of black pepper

Method:

1. Pop all the ingredients in a saucepan and whisk over a gentle heat – with a milk frother if you have one. Once hot pour into a mug, sprinkle with cinnamon, and enjoy!

So there you have it! A little summary of why this natural herb can be so effective. With its potent anti-inflammatory and antioxidant properties, it can touch conditions from depression to arthritis to heart disease. 

Why not enjoy your morning latte on our next sistr coffee morning!

The post Turmeric – 10 Proven Health Benefits appeared first on Sistr Blog.

Now is not the time for business advice. Now is the time to group together, turn to your tribe and, huddle. Take a moment to acknowledge that it’s fine not to have grand plans, to put that 3-5 year business plan on pause, to stop searching for that new career. It’s simply ok to put one foot in front of the other. 

So how do we make those steps?

Sistr turned to Tonia Buxton (Author & Nutrition Expert), Chloe Madeley (Fitness Expert), and Emma Kenny (Psychologist) to offer up some advice on how best to tackle life in this current climate. 

We’re in January, historically the month that is ‘blue’. January 2021 is certainly looking the deepest shade of blue for many. The good faith we had that we were existing within a controlled, planned timeline has been shattered. Emma Kenny refers to a timeframe. When you can hold yourself accountable against that timeframe and, trust that timeframe knowing what you’re facing and how you can navigate it, it’s possible to feel in control. 

Now we’re back where we began with no timeframe, it challenges our vulnerability. How vulnerable do we feel in the world around us? How vulnerable do we feel in the country we’re living in and the implications on our future? How vulnerable do we feel about our children? In our relationships? Add to that the fact there isn’t a way forward, mental health has propelled itself to the forefront.

We’re all feeling exhausted, possibly depressed and, ridden with anxiety. You’re not any of those things. You are burnt out. Emma refers to it as compassion fatigue. It’s the equivalent of being in war but you can’t fight anyone. In war, you can go out and fight the enemy. We’re currently existing in a battle that we have no ability to confront the enemy. It is more important than ever now to decompress and decontaminate yourself from the battlefield. 

Situations are incomparable at the moment. Everyone has unique situations both personally and professionally and it’s easy to feel that we are not worthy of ‘complaining’ and that we’re not entitled to say ‘this is hard’. However, everyone has a subjective struggle. It’s not a competition because someone else is having a worse time. You’ve got to be accepting of your pain, and from that, you can process it.  

Here are some tips from our experts on how to tackle anxiety and process the current situation we’re living in. 

Emma Kenny speaks about how to balance our behaviour and anxiety. 

1. Turn to mindful practice, allow some solitude. Allow yourself to be peaceful. Look at your kids and realise what you’ve created. Practice gratitude. Acknowledge moods and that it’s fine to fluctuate across different moods. Find your tribes, albeit virtually, find others who you can relate to.

1. Practice not catastrophising. Realise that life is somewhat out of your control at the moment. It won’t be forever, but for the moment, scale back your expectations. Turn to a distraction technique which can be as simple as finding objects that start with a certain letter of the alphabet. It creates a cognition and distraction. 

1. Dispute and argue with yourself. If you’re sitting there thinking your company is going to fail or, you’re going to lose your job, argue against it. Firstly, tell yourself that if that did happen it can be turned into a positive – from failure comes some of life’s greatest lessons. Secondly, have words with yourself, why should it fail? Why should you fail?

Chloe Madeley offers some tips on using fitness to tackle life in the current climate and how fitness can play a part in our wellbeing.

1. Start your day with an immediate goal. If you exercise first thing in the morning you achieve a goal before the day has technically started. It shifts your mindset mentally into a positive space – you have achieved a goal and that is to be hugely applauded. You feel like you’ve made an effort and, in doing so, you’re more likely to make decisions based on positive thinking as you’re in a space of self-belief. You have created a momentum that will carry you into the day. 

1. Train as a group on Zoom. It makes you accountable. You feel like you are there as part of a team, despite being online you will feel bonded, connected and, that a sense of community exists. You see everyone operating within a positive environment and that can only have a positive impact on you. If you’re juggling kids and work, accept that a part of the day can be about you. You can find experts within their field who tailor to specific fitness preferences be it resistance training (chat to Chloe), classes based around outdoor fitness (companies such as One Element), dance classes (have a boogie with the Strictly stars such as Oti Mabuse), the fitness industry is thriving now with so many options available online.

1. Change small factors that can trigger anxiety. Actions such as cutting out alcohol, putting your phone down at 6.30 pm every night, not watching the news – small changes can have such a huge impact.

Tonia Buxton offers some ideas on natural solutions to tackle your mindset.

1. Have an Ice bath. Every morning jump into an ice bath or lake. Cold showers, ice swims, ice baths have grown in popularity during the last 12 months and the benefits are widely publicised. Wim Hof, also known as The Iceman is noted for his ability to withstand freezing temperatures. Setting Guinness World Records for swimming under ice and prolonged body contact with ice, he attributes this to his Wim Hof Method. The method combines cold exposure, breathing techniques, and meditation and is definitely worth a read. 

1. Submerge your face in a sink of water and blow bubbles. Yes, you heard it! Fill the sink up, submerge your face under the water and, blow bubbles. Is there psychology around this method? No, not at the moment! It’s just what Tonia does! However, she refers to it being hugely calming, your body is technically acknowledging that you’re not drowning and you are in control.

1. Smell a grounding smell and embrace turmeric. Find a trigger smell that calms you down. It could be mint, rosemary, coffee – if you find yourself spiraling, smell your ‘grounding smell’ and it’ll centre you.  Tonia endorses the addition to turmeric to your diet everyday, either as a raw shot or pop it in a latte! 

Diet is such a huge area in terms of suggestions, benefits, ideas that we’ll throw a whole separate blog your way of tips and facts.

However you tackle life at the moment, allow yourself a moment to listen to your emotions and own your worries. It is FINE to say you’re struggling, mental health is being internalised at the moment and until you vocalise your fears, you cannot process the emotion. 

Whatever method you use to alleviate anxiety, own it, embrace it and follow it through. Motivate yourself to do something that makes you feel awkward. Call on your authentic self to express your feelings clearly and reach out to your community, your tribe, your backbone. 

The post Fit & Fearless for 2021 appeared first on Sistr Blog.

Today’s landscape in the workplace is complicated and constantly on the move. Our mental toughness is constantly tested. ‘Pivot’ has become the new buzzword. We pivot from plan A to plan B. The ability to navigate and manoeuvre is crucial. Does everyone have these traits and personalities? No. Should we all aspire to possess them? Not necessarily, each of us has unique skills and strengths and our goal in life is to find the tap that turns them on. What if we don’t have a plan B to pivot to?

What do you do if you can’t see where to navigate to? 

Does this sound familiar? You’re stuck in a hole, there’s an overwhelming urge to bury your head and emerge 12 months down the line when the world will be a better place. You know you want to shift something. You can possibly see the route you want to take. And yet, you just can’t put one foot in front of the other. 

Just stop for a second and take a breath. Look around you. Raise your head. Say out loud:

“I need a little help here guys. I’m a little bit lost and could do with some guidance”.

There. You’ve done it. You’ve conquered the peak of the mountain: asking for help. And you know what will happen now? Who knows exactly but whatever it is, it will and can only have a positive impact on your life. You’ll gain a mentor, possibly a tribe of mentors and allies and you’ll know that out there in the world, are a whole host of people who have your back.

The power, the energy, the ideas, the positive mindset you’ll gain from just saying ‘help’ will be life-changing. Your courage in wanting to venture into new territory is an achievement in itself. Your desire to seek an authentic life fueled by passion is where the secret to success waits. 

It may feel intimidating, you may feel like you’ve failed, but why? Can’t you see that resilience comes from failure? Asking for help provides an opportunity to learn, apply tips, connect, build allies, and in doing so you’ll make your own strengths visible and your voice heard.  

So get out there, get motivated, shout ‘help’ and gather your tribe. Through connections, you’ll find the strength and determination to re-energise, reflect, re-engage, and then reposition. Then in time, your strengths will be refined, re-honed, and, re-aligned to your core values. Your resilience will stand firm when you climb the next mountain and you’ll learn to fail better.

Here are a few quotes to inspire you!

A mentor is someone who allows you to see the hope inside yourself. (Oprah Winfrey)

Communication leads to community, that is, to understanding, intimacy, and mutual valuing. (Rollo May)

When you find people who not only tolerate your quirks but celebrate them with glad cries of “me too!” be sure to cherish them…because those weirdos are your tribe!

One of the greatest values of mentors is the ability to see ahead what others cannot see and to help them navigate a course to their destination. (John C. Maxwell)

You will be too much for some people. Those people aren’t your people. 

The delicate balance of mentoring someone is not creating them in your own image but giving them the opportunity to create themselves. (Steven Spielberg)

People are weird. When we find someone with weirdness that is compatible with ours, we team up and call it love. (Dr. Seuss)

We make a living by what we get, we make a life by what we give. (Winston Churchill)

Call it a clan. Call it a network. Call it a tribe. Call it a family. Whatever you call it, whoever you are, you need one. (Jane Howard)

The greatest good you can do for another is not just to share your riches but to reveal to him his own. (Benjamin Disraeli)

We’re here for a reason. I believe a bit of the reason is to throw little torches out to lead people through the dark. (Whoopi Goldberg)

The post The Powers of a Community appeared first on Sistr Blog.

Wow. we can safely say 2021 didn’t quite start with the bang it was supposed to! 2 weeks ago who else was pumping? Pumping full of ideas, energy and, positive vibes. Did anyone else find themselves saying “it’s fine we’re turning a corner, new year, new start, new world”?!

And then whammy. 

Here’s how the week has played out for me. Can anyone else relate? 

Monday – Hallelujah, life is on track.

Tuesday – Morning – think positive, he won’t shut schools. Evening – life has come to an end.

Wednesday – Embarked on a massive emotional rollercoaster. Sobbed on most zoom calls. Sobbed on kids. Swore at school apps. Cursed teachers. Cursed work. Cursed life.

Thursday – Gave myself a pep talk. Praised teachers. Praised work for still paying me. Praised life because I‘m alive and healthy.

Friday – Told kids they could have an inset day. Pass me the gin. 

We’re supposed to start 2021 on a high, refreshed from the Christmas break and with new outlooks. But, with the new lockdown in place and mental and emotional well-being taking a nose dive it’s crucial we dig deep. So, let’s leave 2020 behind us and focus on some positives on the horizon and how we can approach 2021.

A cruel statement to make is that it looks like this virus is here to stay. Mentally that is a hard one to process as we had high expectations last year that it would disappear at some stage. But, we can turn that thought process around. Yes we will face obstacles along the way but, turn this into a positive: grass grows through concrete. 

We are more powerful than we realise. 

Look 2021 in the eye, raise it a positive attitude, punch it with emotional stamina, and know that we can keep going regardless of the obstacles. 

Mother Nature has equipped us with a negativity bias in order to survive. Psychologist Rick Hanson stated, “The brain is like velcro for negative experiences but Teflon for positive ones”. The lifeline of our negativity bias far outweighs positivity which results in us overestimating threats and underestimating our ability to overcome them. Enter a pandemic and, a negative force so strong that it tests our power to deal with it to exponential levels. 

So how can we adapt and approach 2021 with positivity? 

Here are some tips to help you try and alleviate the threats and effects of the pandemic. 

See 2020 as a lesson. Remove the connotation of it as a misery that you endured and ask yourself what can/have you learned from it? 2020 didn’t happen to you, it happened for you. The hardships aren’t roadblocks, they’re opportunities. Take the difficulties and turn them into opportunities to learn something about yourself, the world, your life, your approach. What have you learned that you are carrying into 2021?

Be grateful. Take a step back. You may be scared, disappointed, angry. But look at the bigger picture. Write it down if you need to but just consider all the things in your life that you haven’t been able to do. Did you previously take them for granted? Well, don’t anymore. Consider the changes you’ve made, the people who’ve stepped up, the processes you’ve since changed. Just ask yourself, every single day, what are you grateful for? 

Practise positive self-talk. Highlight your wins, no matter what they are, underline them in a big, bold, permanent marker pen. Don’t knock yourself and instead, practise self-compassion. Now is not the time to be modest. High-fiving yourself is crucial, shout loud and proud about what you’ve achieved. If you’re a natural introvert try this. Record a little video every day. You can mention your fears, your worries, your frustrations but end it with what you’ve achieved and what you’re patting yourself on the back for. When you’re in a hole, play it back to yourself and remind yourself how strong you are. 

Focus on the solution. The minute you start channeling your energy towards a host of possibilities rather than problems you’ll regain control and feel more empowered. Empowerment leads to a sense of calm, it shifts the mindset. The negativity bias referred to earlier will naturally send you along the path of problems. Don’t let it. Widen your perspective. What possibilities can you see both in the short-term and long-term of 2021?

Accept solitude. Step back from the daily grind for a moment and take a bird’s-eye view of your daily life. Yoga, meditation, praying, nature, breathing, solitude is good for the soul and will, for a moment, connect you to something on a far greater scale than yourself. From here, you can find inspiration, calmness and an appreciation of what you’re dealing with in the ‘now’.

Heading into 2021 and it’s more crucial now than ever to chose a positive approach. In doing so, you are choosing to attack 2021 from a position of strength, both mentally and physically. 

2021 should quiver in its boots as we wait patiently, like a coiled snake ready to spring back at its prey with a vengeance. 

The post We Are More Powerful Than We Believe appeared first on Sistr Blog.

7 months. 7 months we’ve been in this now. It wasn’t supposed to be this long. It wasn’t supposed to impact us like this. It wasn’t supposed to last. And yet here we are. 7 months later, and we’re crashing. Crashing hard in some cases. It was inevitable, our brains simply cannot process the level of stress they’re being subjected to. And yet, we get back up, over and over again, no matter how hard it is, we get back up. 

So what’s happening to us and how can we deal with the anxiety and fear? 

Psychologist Emma Kenny urges us to believe that our reactions are normal. It isn’t ‘personal’, our exhaustion, lethargy, frayed patience, isn’t us, but our internal response to external forces. The area of our brain – the prefrontal cortex – a powerful area of consciousness and higher functioning – is operating on a plane never experienced by our generation before. It is the ‘instinct’ area of our brain, heightened to deal with a threat, that propels us into fight, flight or freeze mode. This instinct should only kick in for a few seconds or minutes. And yet, here we are, 7 months later, exhausting our prefrontal cortex. 

To what end? Does it bounce back? Will it bounce back? Who knows, but if we attempt to rationalise with ourselves and realise it isn’t ‘personal’ could this help us to explain our heightened emotions and anxiety? Perhaps. It’s hard not to take it personally. 

The area of our brain under pressure can also be referred to as the ‘surge capacity’.

The surge capacity is a collection of adaptive systems – mental and physical – that humans draw on for short-term survival in acutely stressful situations, such as natural disasters”. (Ann Master, PhD). 

There’s the key word – ‘short-term’. Pandemics however, take a whole other trajectory where the disaster becomes long-term. In any usual short-term disaster, the surge capacity replaces and renews itself. 7 months and going strong and, the ability to replace and renew simply isn’t presenting itself. Our brains are exhausted. We punish ourselves because we feel that we should have ‘adapted’ and be used to this by now. The phrase ‘new normal’ gets thrown about as easily as our Government throws about conflicting stats. It’s a phrase we’re supposed to pick up and run with. Hands up if you actually want to run away? 

How do we adapt to the ‘new normal’? How do we adjust to a new daily work and home life that is constantly shifting? We cannot focus on disaster recovery yet as we are not yet in a recovery period. So instead, we have to ‘cope’ and find methods that help us to cope. 

What can we do to enable us to get back up and keep going?

Understand why you’re feeling helpless. I’m a problem solver, a fixer, I like to address something, fix it and move on. Is this possible right now? No, none of this is possible. Our mindset in the UK is solution-orientated but faced with an issue with no solution, we are effectively dealing with a ‘loss’. We’ve lost the freedom of daily movement as we chose. We’ve lost trust in our Government, lost levels of expected quality in areas such as schooling, customer services. We’ve lost friendships, relationships, weddings, holidays. We’ve lost the ability to run ‘life’ as we chose to. This equates to a major loss. 

Not all loss is a loss; sometimes, you need a loss to become a boss. Lose the parts of your lifestyle that no longer serve you, lose the people in your life who no longer support you, and definitely lose whatever attitude has you believing the world owes you. (The Captain)

Lower your expectations of yourself. We spend our lives striving to achieve, to prove ourselves, to break down barriers, pave a new path, pave an old path better. Stop for a bit, and give yourself permission to stop and reflect. Acknowledge where you draw your energy from and, give yourself a bit of slack. If your energy comes from that business idea that’s niggled away then divert your energy into that. Go forth and conquer that business, conquer that book you’ve wanted to read, that recipe you’ve wanted to cook, that job opportunity you’ve wanted to go for, take the wins in whatever capacity they come. 

Accept life. We all have different perceptions of life at the moment. Whether we agree with masks or not, whether we acknowledge the stats or call their bluff, whether we believe a vaccine is the cure to everything or not. Don’t challenge life on a daily basis, accept it as it is. Accept what you believe in and accept that it may not be the same as what someone else believes in. Let’s accept that we cannot change the situation right now but that we’re going to attempt to enjoy life despite this. Accept the days where you want to not get out of bed and do nothing other than binge watch Netflix. Allow yourself to accept them and acknowledge the sadness. Then accept the next day, or 2 or 3 days later, is a different day. Use this next day to achieve something. 

Look after yourself.  Get creative, think outside of your normal, find an activity that’s meaningful and invest your energy in it. Don’t allow yourself to be at the mercy of what is happening in the world at the moment, bring your focus back to the ‘here and now’. 

Build your resilience. It’s never too late to start. Start small and build the momentum. Sleep, exercise, nutrition, breathing, gratitude, plan in a little bit each day. Emma Kenny recommends techniques such as the 4-7-8 method for breathing and anxiety around sleep. Try inhaling through your nose for 4 seconds, hold in for 7 seconds, breathe out for 8 seconds. Go for a little run, buy some healthy snacks, check in with a friend, have a snooze. Do something for you. 

Fear and anxiety are real and overwhelming and can be crippling. But let’s just take a moment to acknowledge that you’re not experiencing this alone, you’re not losing the plot and if you are, we’re right with you! If you’re feeling swamped, overwhelmed or just a little bit (or a whole lot) fed up just reach out to us. The road just got a little bit longer but we’ll keep getting back up and walking it together and we’ll be ok in the end. 

The post Why Do We All Feel Broken? appeared first on Sistr Blog.

2020, the year of COVID-19 and, what’s become apparent is that women have born the brunt of the crisis. Too few women in top positions in corporations, not enough serving as politicians and only one fifth of businesses are founded by women. Let’s not mention the fact that women get shockingly less funding from investors than men.

Do we accept this? No. We strive to smash these inequalities. How? We support each other. 

I’m a firm believer in having a strong network of female role models and mentors around me (Emma Sayle, Founder of sistr)

Women coaching other women who have been through similar challenges is a powerful force. Many of our struggles are not unique and sharing our experiences is not only a good way to learn but gives us confidence that it isn’t just us fighting a battle alone.

Sistr’s mentoring platform, aimed specifically at career minded women, is proving more crucial now than ever. Here we share tips on getting a mentoring programme underway.

• Find a suitable mentor

It may sound obvious but you need women who want to share their wisdom. They should be enthusiastic about helping others avoid some of the hurdles and difficulties they may have faced. Avoid a mentor who guards their knowledge for themselves but enjoys the glory of being labelled a mentor.

Genuine mentors are aware that it is only through helping and nurturing other women that we will be able to break the cycle of male dominated senior positions. They will also be able to help shape your career, build your confidence and make you feel like you’re having a chat with a very helpful friend. When a mentor arrives with this attitude, they usually quickly build a rapport with their mentee.

Use a networking platform to find one who is genuinely invested in the art of mentoring.

• Define your goal

Many people like the idea of having a mentor but can’t articulate what they need from their sessions.

Simply saying that you’re unhappy in your career isn’t enough for a mentor to work with. Identify the problem. Do you want a career change but need a confidence boost to do it? Do you keep coming into conflict with your boss over the same issue but don’t know how to resolve it? Do you simply need support in organizing a busy schedule – an important skill that is under taught!

• Focus on one issue for each session

A common reason women seek a mentor is because they want to leave their job and start a business. If that’s the case, narrow the focus. Do you want help with a marketing plan? Raising funds? And when do you need answers to these questions?

Apply the SMART approach to what you want from each session: 

Make it Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Realistic and Timely.

• Prepare, prepare, prepare

The mentee is as much responsible for the outcome of a session as the mentor.

As with all time-limited meetings, come prepared with an agenda so you don’t drift off into a tangent. Don’t be tempted to gossip or use the time to moan about your industry. And remember to stick to professional issues, not personal ones.

You are here to solve problems not identify them. Given that a mentor is likely to be in a senior role or running a business themselves, respect that they are giving time for you so use it well.

• Drive the pace

If you have several questions, keep an eye on the time so you can speed things up if you have loads of unanswered questions and you’re only halfway through. The mentor won’t know what questions you have up your sleeve or what you already know and don’t know, so feel free to guide them and move on if they are covering something which isn’t quite what you need help on.

• Follow-up

Decide how you will follow up after your first session. Set a time for a call, or a date when you’ll contact them with questions or a report on progress. Keep a written record of what you discussed and if it’s in note form fill in the gaps while it’s fresh. Identify the to-do’s and transfer those to whatever to-do system you use.

If you feel you aren’t getting what you want from your mentor, express that and suggest how you could restructure the next session. They will be figuring you out and they can only identify the issues you need help with if you can articulate them clearly.

• Seek advice from others before you begin

Ask other people who have gone through mentoring what they got out of it and what they would have done differently. People who have experienced mentoring will know things that you won’t have thought of. They may even have some materials you could use such as templates for goal setting or tools for tracking progress.

• Be open

Speaking from the heart, don’t be afraid to show vulnerability. A good mentor will recognize that the biggest leaps in learning come from setbacks and challenges. A mentor may seem like an expert in their field, but they, like everyone, will have got to where they are as a result of learning their mistakes.

Women in business have a common understanding that the challenges we confront are different to those of our male peers, but this affords us a unique experience from a mentoring relationship.

Sistr’s mission is to help you, any of you, in whatever area of their career you need assistance with. COVID-19 has brought about changes, unimaginable changes. Let’s work together to turn ideas into opportunities, let’s guide each other, nurture each other and above all, back each other. Reach out to us for a chat. 

The post The Importance of a Mentor appeared first on Sistr Blog.

Top tips from an employment lawyer who happens to be a flexible worker too!

Sarah Wilder, a Partner at MPM Legal, speaks to sistr about flexible working rights, how to ask for them and, what to do if you aren’t allowed them.

The first thing I want to say is that although flexible working is not exclusively for parents, it is often parents (and particularly mothers, although I hope that is changing to include all parents) who want to work flexibly.  I could write a whole separate article about how we should be making it more acceptable and accessible for men to work flexibly, but that’s not what I’m talking about today. 

What I am talking about is how to approach the decision to work flexibly and how you can maximise your chances of doing this successfully.

Tip 1 – Have agency in the decision about who will (literally and figuratively) be left holding the baby.

One of the best tips I can give you is that if you want to become a parent, and you want to become a parent with your current partner, and they feel the same, then one of the things that you should be talking about waaaaaayyyyy before you actually have a child is how you are going to share responsibility for looking after that child when it arrives, and what sort of childcare you are going to put in place together with how you’re going to pay for that.  So many fantastically intelligent and empowered woman don’t seem to consider that they need to discuss and agree with their partner how they would like to deal with the split between childcare and their career until it’s too late, and they are trapped in a particular scenario that doesn’t make them happy, often whilst paying for the childcare themselves without any financial help from their partner.  This is rarely a recipe for happiness.

My husband and I had a number of conversations before we had kids about what we would do when we had them, and we agreed that we would split the responsibility for childcare down the middle. We also agreed that for us, the right childcare arrangement was a nursery setting rather than a Nanny (and not just for cost reasons).  This has doubtless meant that we have both taken a hit on our careers, but for us, both taking a bit of a hit rather than one of us stepping away from our career was the right call – and honestly, whilst I have occasional pangs that the grass might be greener for some of my amazing friends who stuck with the City law firms or have taken big in-house jobs and whose careers are flying as a result, I know damn well that they look at the balance that I have between life and work and my proverbial grass looks pretty green from their perspective too.  

However you choose to cut the childcare/working life cake, you will find no judgement here, but for goodness sake think about it, talk about it and agree it with your partner so it’s a team decision, rather than a series of assumptions and societally imposed defaults that leave you literally, and figuratively, holding the baby.

Tip 2: Plan your flexible working request like you would any other business plan/project/pitch

So, you’ve had the discussion, decided who is going to do what (or this isn’t anything to do with childcare or even caring responsibilities for an adult, you just want to work flexibly) – what next?  Next, you need to think about how you maximise your chances of your request being granted.

You need to plan.  What is your ideal working pattern?  Are you still going to be able to deliver your job if you work that way?  If not, what are your solutions for changing your role so that you can work flexibly?  If you can’t have your ideal, what could you live with/make work?  What are the absolute boundaries beyond which it’s not going to work for you?  What’s the impact on your household finances of your proposed working pattern (because, by the way, at least where childcare is concerned, it shouldn’t just be your responsibility to pay for childcare, it’s a joint cost – see point 1 above)?

Be prepared to negotiate and to show some flexibility in order to find an arrangement that works for you and your employer – the best employers will be open-minded and work with their employees to find a workable solution if they can’t agree the request in its initial form and you need to be prepared to meet them in the middle, subject to the boundaries already referred to above.

When you are planning, bear in mind that employers can refuse a request for one of eight statutory reasons, which largely go to the impact that your request will have on the business, so you need to factor in your response to these potential reasons for refusal – attack is the best form of defence here.  Here’s the list:

The burden of additional costs

An inability to reorganise work amongst existing staff

An inability to recruit additional staff

A detrimental impact on quality

A detrimental impact on performance

Detrimental effect on ability to meet customer demand

Insufficient work for the periods the employee proposes to work

Planned structural changes to the business

Really think through what your employer will be worried about and how you can reassure them.  Be creative!  When I made my first major flexible working request, I asked to work compressed hours, squashing my job into four days instead of five, with three days in the office and one at home.  I knew that the nature of my job at the time meant that my employer was not going to get in another resource to work 20% of my job, so I agreed that I would deliver my whole job in four days and continue to be paid to deliver the job, rather than take a pay cut to do the same amount of work.  It was bloody hard at times, but I never resented the hours I was working in the same way as I would have if I was doing it for 80% of my salary.  I was able to show that the work would still get done, and in order to assuage any concerns my employer had that I wouldn’t deliver, we agreed a trial period (see below).

Tip 3: Back yourself

Most women I know need to get better at this.  You shouldn’t feel that you need to apologise or make excuses for wanting to work flexibly.  Instead, you should try to refocus that energy into why it’s such a great thing for you and for your employer – they will retain some top talent, who will be engaged and excited because she is able to look to her wellbeing and where relevant, have the time she wants with her family, as well as having a fulfilling role and career prospects.  The loyalty that this engenders is off the charts – take it from one who knows!

In a similar vein, men, you should also back yourself to ask for and succeed in getting flexible working.  I get that culturally, and societally, you might feel like an outlier for asking for something that not many men do in your company.  But if you do it, and do it well, then you are going to be responsible for the cultural shift that needs to happen in this country to level the playing field from a gender perspective for the working generation now, and the ones to follow.  If doing it to support your wife/partner/female co-workers isn’t enough, do it for your daughters, so that when they get to the workplace, it’s the norm for people to be able to fulfil the caring roles they want and need to fulfil, whilst bossing it at their career as well.

Tip 4: Don’t blindside your boss

This is a delicate one – if you work for a firm of dinosaurs who are going to question your commitment because you have the temerity to want to do something other than work 60 hours a week in the office, you might want to think quite hard about changing job when the opportunity arises rather than making a flexible working request(!).  

However, assuming that your employer is on board with the benefits of flexibility and you have a good relationship with your line manager, it’s a good idea to chat through your proposal before you make a formal request, so that it doesn’t come as a huge surprise.  I was lucky when I made my first request that I worked for an amazing woman who agreed my first pitch, made verbally over lunch whilst I was on maternity leave, so I didn’t have to move to my alternative options, but it was a real confidence boost to know that she was backing me when I made the formal request to HR (especially since I’m pretty sure I was the first person in that legal team to make a case for working compressed hours).

Tip 5: Don’t be afraid of a trial period

It’s actually a really good idea, when you’ve found an arrangement that works for employer and employee, to put a decent trial period in place – my first one was four months, for example, which ended up being extended because I managed to contract pneumonia whilst pregnant with my second son and had to have a chunk of time off work so we couldn’t really judge how the arrangement was working.  After I came back from maternity leave and could show the arrangement was working well, it was signed off without any problems.  The trial period gives an opportunity to iron out any kinks so that you are in the best possible position to succeed in the long term in delivering your job whilst working flexibly, because it is not only possible, but likely, that you might need to make some tweaks to really make it work.

In conclusion 

The coronavirus pandemic has changed the workplace.  There are many incredibly worrying statistics about the impact the pandemic has had on women’s careers, which whilst they make my blood boil, are outside of the scope of this blog, but there is no doubt that a lot of employers who would have shied away from allowing their employees to work flexibly have had their eyes opened to the benefits.

If you are not allowed to work flexibly, you may well be able to take legal action against your employer, but if possible, it’s far better to take control of your destiny, research, plan and ultimately, make them an offer that they simply can’t refuse… and if they still refuse, then maybe get in touch and take some advice from someone like me!

Sistr is on a mission to help all our sistrs in this COVID-19 world. As ever, reach out to us, for a chat, advice, in need of a mentor, we are here, as a community, to help.

The post Tips on How to Get Flexible Working appeared first on Sistr Blog.

Let’s face it, we are in a really strange place right now with all of this pandemic going on. There are lots of people feeling fearful, and that can add to our anxiety.  

It can be really hard to manage your mindset in this crazy new world. However, it’s imperative that you do. 

Why? 

Because it’s the one thing that you can control right now. 

Let me say that again. Your mindset is the one thing that you can control right now. You can change how you feel in this red hot minute. You don’t have to spend money, you don’t need to leave the house and you don’t even need to spend hours learning something new. How cool is that? 

No matter what’s going on outside, you can control your feelings and reactions to it. 

I’m going to share three of these hacks with you.  

1. Manage your mindset monkeys 

We all have mindset monkeys. Those nagging little messengers that constantly tell you that you’re not good enough, not smart enough, not ready. They can instil you with fear and doubt. They’re actually just trying to keep you safe, but you have to give them a banana to shut them up! 

This simple strategy helps you bypass those naughty monkeys, and move forward with confidence 

Imagine your future you. The one that’s feeling really confident. 

• How would you behave? 
• What would you tell yourself? 
• What would you do differently? 
• How would you go about your day? 
• What would you see, hear, feel? 

Step into that future you now. Act as if you already have all of those fabulous traits. 

Not sure you’ve been that confident, or know how to feel really confident? That’s okay. Think of someone that exudes confidence for you, then run those questions through that filter instead. 

Don’t need confidence? Replace it with any other word you want to feel. Maybe it’s motivated, productive, energised. Just play and notice what comes up for you. 

You may find that your monkeys might just start to settle down. 

2. Shift your focus to shift your thinking 

When you believe that everything going on is outside of your control, you’re giving away your power. 

Instead, decide today that you create your own life. Choose to take responsibility for your life and what happens in it.  

When you take responsibility, you come from a powerful place because you believe you can affect change. You’re not dependent on anyone else. There will always be things that feel out of our control, that’s life. It’s how you react to them that counts. 

• Been made redundant? Maybe it’s time to consider setting up the business that you’ve always dreamed about 
• Bank balance looking shaky? What could you create to sell? Is it time for a declutter to sell off things you no longer use? Are you a whizz at technology and could help others all from the comfort of your own home? 
• There’s always a way to move through obstacles. You just have to get creative, and know that you can choose how you feel at any given point in time. Shift your focus from giving other people power, to you having the power to affect change. 

3. Keep a positive mindset when the world is falling down around you 

A quick way to change your mindset is to shift your focus, and that shifts your thinking. Instead of thinking about what’s going wrong, focus on what’s going right. Practising gratitude for everything that you have is an amazing place to start. It feels such a simple practice that you believe it can’t possibly work, however it can really shift your thinking massively. Focus on all of the good things and you’ll start to notice more good things coming your way. 

I don’t know about you, but I find the word ‘ lockdown’ really stifling. For me, and a lot of people, it generates anxiety. The word ‘lockdown’ feels like we have no control.  

Instead of using words that constrict you, change them into words that empower you.  

Here’s what I did – I’ve got rid of the word ‘lockdown’ completely, and I replaced it with Spring Retreat, and Summer Retreat. We are currently in a semi lockdown of sorts again in Scotland, so now instead of lockdown it’s called an Autumn Retreat.  

I can’t tell you the number of people that adopted the strategy, and found themselves feeling instantly calmer. Thinking of these imposed restraints in a different way opens up a whole new thought process. When you think about the word ‘ Retreat’, you can’t help but think of all of the lovely things that you can do for yourself and others. 

This doesn’t just apply to the current pandemic. It applies to everything that you do. 

Grab a pen, some paper, and a cuppa (I’ll have a cappuccino please!) and do this simple exercise: 

Write a list of all of the negative words & phrases that you use. 

Ask yourself, how can I say the same thing using positive and empowering language? Here’s a couple of examples: 

Instead of: 

• I’m worried that I might lose my job with this pandemic going on 

Say something like this: 

• I will use this time wisely to develop my skills so that I am ready for any sudden changes that might happen as a result of the pandemic. I’ve got lots of transferrable skills. 

Let go of telling yourself this: 

• I feel anxious about everything that’s going on in the world 

And tell yourself this instead 

• I can’t control what’s going on in the world, but I can control me. What one thing could I do today to bring in a bit of calm, fun, laughter into my life? 

Ultimately, it all begins with you. You have the capacity to feel better instantly. Learn how to manage a mindset monkeys, shift your focus to shift your thinking and develop a positive mindset no matter what’s going on around you. 

You’ve got this!

If you need some support with leadership, mindset, small business growth attracting dreamie clients and more, you can connect with Ruby on sistr.

Sistr is here to help! Our mission is to make sure no woman is left behind. Whether you’re looking for a mentor, someone to chat to, a free webinar to have a listen to, we’re here. Sign up and spread the word.

The post Managing Your Mind Set In a Crazy COVID New World with Ruby McGuire appeared first on Sistr Blog.

Courage starts with showing up and letting ourselves be seen

(Brene Brown)

You’d never guess it, but most public speakers will admit to being naturally shy. Surely not!? Surely there’s too much irony in an introvert being an unlikely inspirational speaker? Actually, it isn’t luck or irony, it’s honing your skills by trial and error and a whole heap of training.  

How do you give confident, captivating presentations both online and offline? What tips can help you overcome your fear of public speaking?

Resham Kotecha, Founder of Podium Perfect, has taken her experience (and fear!) of public speaking on the campaign trail and turned it into a business. Podium Perfect trains female candidates through public speaking webinars with 25,000 sign-ups from over 100 countries.

We take a look at 6 simple tips for public speaking.

• Choose the Voice Inside Your Head

Resham Kotecha, gave some great advice on one of our latest sistr instagram chats.

Shut down the devil voice!

Create a cheerleading voice that becomes your greatest fan. A voice that shouts ‘You can do this!!’. 

Take your self-criticism and turn it into something positive. Because you CAN do this. If you’re struggling to win yourself over, get external validation from friends. State openly, “I’m struggling, I need you to build my confidence”. Friends or trusted associates will then go out of their way to build you up. And if they don’t, sack them off as friends!

• Plan. Prepare. Practice.

Sweaty palms, wobbly hands, heart pounding? Don’t associate these feelings with failure. Welcome to the adrenaline rush of public speaking! Brene Brown, an incredible TED talker (and absolutely worth a watch,) hit the nail on the head.

Vulnerability is the birthplace of innovation, creativity and change

Believe it or not, feeling vulnerable and nervous is good. That adrenaline makes you more alert and ready to nail your performance. So plan, prep and practise. Plan your notes, prepare your delivery and presentation and then practise. Tape it and ask a friend or mentor to critique. Sounds so simple doesn’t it?!

• Stay Quiet.

This would go against a lot of better judgements, mine included! The awkward silence moment where you blurt for the sake of blurting? We’ve all done it. Simon Sinek, one of TED’s most-watched speakers, says do the opposite.

A lot of people start talking right away, and it’s out of nerves. That communicates a little bit of insecurity and fear.

Go with this method instead. Walk out on stage (or start your Zoom call, heck it’s 2020 after all, the year of video calls!), breathe, place yourself physically where you want to be, count to 5 and then begin. Those 5 seconds will seem like a lifetime but in those 5 seconds you’ve composed yourself, commanded the attention of the audience and showed them who’s boss.

• Give Value. Don’t Take.

Audiences are like a pack of wolves. If you stand and sell, sell, they’ll clock out. Create value and give a little bit of yourself back to them. Dani Wallace aka The Queen Bee and Speaker Coach who mentors many of our sistrs, explains that the best way to connect is by sharing something of yourself with the audience. 

The audience is looking to connect with you, so peel back a layer.

If an audience can take a positive away, an inspiration, an idea, a way to change something in their lives that they’ve related to from you, then consider that a win.

• Deliver Your Performance to Each Audience Member.

Sinek also declares that ‘scanning and panning’ is your nemesis. 

You may think you’re engaging with everyone and you may be doing this on purpose so as to avoid eye contact. 

But, you’re disconnecting from everyone. As painful as it might feel, make sure you look at an audience member directly in the eye. Sinek goes as far as to say you should deliver a whole sentence to that one person. Then move onto the next person and hit them with your next sentence. By doing so, you’re creating a deeper connection and you’re also enticing the entire audience to watch, and most importantly, listen intently in case your eye lands on them. 

If you’re sitting on a train or tube right now, try it. Go over the speech in your head silently delivering it to each and every person. They may not look at you but it’ll help you focus your eye. If they do look up, just smile at them, we need more smiling!

• Put it Into Perspective

Let’s be honest with ourselves here, you cannot eradicate nerves totally. But what’s the worst that can happen? You fluff up a line. You skip a word. You stumble over something and have to repeat. It’s not going to undo your whole career! Diane Griffin, a sistr coach and mentor from the world of Property, sums it up perfectly .

Live life to its fullest, really go for it, even if it doesn’t work. There’s time to recover. Recovery is easier than regret.

So get yourselves up on that podium or infront of that camera and go for it. Take our tips and translate them into actions. If you need further advice or, you’d like to look into a coaching programme then reach out to us at sistr and we’ll pop you in touch with one of our amazing big sistrs. You’ll be top of the TED talk superstar performers chart before you know it!

The post Find Your Voice with Resham Kotecha appeared first on Sistr Blog.

Erika Brodnock is the creator of digital resources covering emotional and social learning, digital safety, and digital parenting. She is also Sky News’ children’s wellbeing expert and her corporate seminars cover most areas of family life.

Erika is passionate about making sure that every child has an equal opportunity for success and is founder and CEO at Karisma Kidz and Kami.  The brand is loved by parents and children, is preloaded to around 2 million devices, and championed by the Sunday Times as the next big thing to shake up the children’s entertainment industry.

Sistr caught up with Erika to talk about her businesses and tips for parents during lockdown.

What is Karisma Kidz?

Karisma Kidz is a multi-award winning brand that delivers emotional learning to young children through play and provides feedback to the whole family. The mobile app gamifies established methods for building emotional literacy and links seamlessly with toys, activities, and rewards in the real world, teaching children that real superheroes interact positively with others.  My passion is helping kids become more illiterate and providing the tools to enable them to do so and parents to support this. 

How does it Operate from a Business Point of View?

Karisma Kidz builds relationships with companies who want to put children’s wellbeing at the centre of their ethos and strategy. Tablets are pre-loaded with apps and tools and there is a simple version on the app store. Companies pay a fee for every tablet purchased with their product on. This enables us to sell at a lower price and to make them available free of charge in cases to parents most in need as companies carry a large share of the costs.

Define what you mean as Emotional Intelligence in children?

I’ve written some stories about emotional intelligence where I refer to it as the emoji moment. In short it’s when emotions take over and the child becomes a different person and emotional intelligence is trying to get the child back to the place where you recognise them and the tools they use to get back to that place.  Our tools help children to understand how they’re feeling and what they can do to shift to a different way of feeling, a different ‘type’ of feeling as well as understanding the different emotions that are at play. We use traditional games to identify emotions. Games are used such as snap but rather than use numbers the cards have angry and happy faces. Children recognise different feelings and the different ‘faces’ that they can look like. Once they grasp how they’re feeling and why – perhaps they’re cross because a toy has been taken away without notice – the parent can also adapt their own behaviour to help the child ie give 5 mins notice to the child rather than act on instinct. My main advice is always take a deep breath which is often hard with children – I tell them to use an imaginary remote control – press stop on the remote to stop the anger – make them laugh which then removes anger.  It’s all about hints and tips to enable them to return to their happy selves. 

What is your other business Kami?

Having helped the children with emotional intelligence I wanted to set up the tools and support to parents to develop emotional intelligence so I set up Kami. Myself and my partners recognised that it needs both sides – children and parents – to be addressed.  Kami targets parents in the first 5 years pre and post birth, it addresses the whole adjustment process. We have a pool of sleep experts, doulas, lactation consultants and many others on hand who can provide support along the journey as a new parent. The ethos around this is that parents can model better behaviour if they feel supported. 

How Is Lockdown Affecting Your businesses? 

The business has had to pivot quickly. I have been inundated with people wanting advice for life in general and business situations. I have also set up a Facebook group for people home schooling. The pressure to manage children and work has been building and I want to support as much as I can. In this situation both personally as parents and in business, flexibility is key. 

What is your Advice to Parents Homeschooling?

Mix school work up with other activities. If your children are under 8 I’d recommend no more than a 20 minute concentration ‘session’ and then break. Break the day down into smaller increments both for your sanity and the children’s concentration levels. If work is your priority then check in for 20 minutes with a game or a school led exercise and then let them ‘play’. I’m a firm believer in boredom – I think it’s a key skill that children need to manage. Homeschool is about remembering reading, writing and arithmetic but more importantly about creativity. Introduce games into learning – use a pack of cards to count, play snap, help cook and measure out ingredients, what could you replace in the recipe to make a different taste. One of my favourite activities is to create hands with paints and cardboard, cut out the shapes having drawn round your hands, colour them in and make a family lockdown montage – its an activity that will bond you as a family, you’ll be teaching and loving and having fun. 

Technology – is there too much within the homeschooling from schools? Is it lazy teaching? 

Endless links and apps to log into can lead to feeling useless as a parent. If you can’t access the link, spend more than a few seconds accessing it then children, especially under 11, will already have lost interest.  We recommend a ‘5-a-day’ play activity – inline with fruit and veg – but activities! I’d generally say use the tech for the teaching, not necessarily for the fun activity side of the day. But heck if you need that movie length to do some work then during this period of time, you use whatever tools will entertain your kids. 

What’s your advice on Routine vs No routine?

I’d recommend a bit of structure but with flexibility. With no routine, children will wake up not knowing what they’re going to get that day and that can lead to confusion and a huge lack of energy. A small amount of structure creates security then if you need to, moving away from the structure can be seen as a treat and fun. Don’t mirror school with a full timetable (unless it works for you and your child is embracing it!) but some semblance of routine gives purpose. Too much rigidity can create anxious kids and anxious parents and gives off a bubble of perfectionism which isn’t great mentally. 

What’s your advice for Businesses?

 I’d say you need to flex now day to day. Listen to advice, gather info, embrace the chaos, go leftfield and don’t be afraid of changing direction. Be responsive – what do people need? How can I best serve the people approaching me for help (whether that’s children or your audience as a business or parents/friends), how can you respond to their needs? If you don’t have an entrepreneurial streak there is no shame in saying I can only handle my world at the moment. Take time to fill the jug of life, don’t panic and actually build in me time and embrace the pace. I’d always say have a selfish moment – it’ll mean you can best serve them and best serve you.

What’s your Daily ritual to keep you sane? 

Breathing! I’m a fan of a US Company called Institute of Heart Math. They calculate that if you take deep breaths in for the count of 6 and out for the count of 6 – imagine the breathe going through your heart – then add in what you’re grateful for – this will get you in the zone mentally, it’ll get you into coherence. I do it in the morning and it gives me the clarity I need for the day. Breathing allows your brain to equate a breath as a checkpoint to balance emotions. 

Diversity – what work are you doing within Diversity? 

I and 6 other partners in the latter part of last year created Extend Ventures. Its purpose it to look at economic well being for diverse and BAME communities – females and other sexual orientations. It has a look at how the inequality that exists in society means that people from those backgrounds are more susceptible to disharmony.  There’s a line of thinking that COVID deaths are linked to the working class. Our research looks at how wealth is being structured in the country on the whole. Why do disproportionate amounts go to middle class, middle aged males who use entrepreneurship as means for creating economic wellbeing so are the least ‘wanting’ group who don’t need to go out to the front line. We are looking at ways to trigger change.  No one should ever be in a position where you’re ‘damned if you do damned if you don’t’.

Do you have any Advice for People needing support at this time?

As ever I would say reach out to me and I will try and help in whatever way I can. I have a huge network of contacts who can be utilised to provide help in any areas necessary. 

Thank you Erika for your incredibly insightful chat…we’re in awe of your commitment and knowledge and dedication to making a difference. If anyone would like to reach out to Erika directly please do through Linkedin or Twitter. 

The post Erika Brodnock – The Impact of Technology on Teaching & Parenting appeared first on Sistr Blog.

Sistr had the absolute honour of being joined by Dani Wallace, an international speaker, motivational coach and professional singer. Dani is one incredible woman having overcome homelessness as a single parent, domestic abuse and self-sabotage she is now the fearless and inspirational leader of what Dani describes as The Queen Bee Movement…helping women across the world Show Up, Wise Up and Rise Up. 

Motivational speaker, coach by day, singer by night, author of Closed Mouths Don’t Get Fed. Dani’s message is all about finding your voice and owning it and delivering the message in the right way whilst getting rid of imposter syndrome. 

How did you get into this? Who are you?!

This is my Nikki Graham from Big Brother moment! “Who is She”…?! 

I’ve been on stage since I was 14yrs old travelling the world. I knew with my background that I was never going to be able to afford to travel and my only way to travel was to get paid to do it. So I lied about my age and hit the stage to travel as an actor. After a few years, my family and friends said come home and put down roots.  I was then in my early 20’s and I came back and worked in HR in the corporate world training people to speak.  I then started singing and working for myself but I found myself with time in the week not doing anything, I felt like I wasn’t giving back. I had been through a journey and I wanted to share my skills in presenting and speaking to help others. I pieced together TheQueenBee – setup to help women speak, share their message and become more visible.

The QueenBee name….what’s the story behind the name?

I was watching the Bee Movie with my kids one day and it was at a time when I was thinking what was going to be my ‘in’, how was I going to brand myself? How was I going to translate the message that someone’s past doesn’t need to dictate their future. I have been a victim of domestic violence, I have been homeless, I’ve lost jobs and the bee resonated with me. The Bee shouldn’t be able to fly – it has tiny wings and a fat body and it just shouldn’t fly – but the movie shows that bees don’t care what humans think and they fly anyway regardless of their circumstances! This was my calling! This should be our mantra – we can fly regardless of circumstances! I hang my hat on that moment! 

‘According to all known laws of aviation, there is no way a bee should be able to fly. It’s wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground. The bee, of course, flies anyway, because bees don’t care what humans think is impossible.’

Why do your clients come to you? What are their biggest struggles? 

The best way to connect is by sharing something of yourself with your audience. The first thing people do when they come to a talk/tune into listen online is they’re looking to connect with something about you. When people are in the public eye they have a construct they have to adhere to. They’re actually sharing a persona but they’re presenting an image. Tash Hamilton – a client of mine is an example (and she won’t mind me mentioning her…).  People know about Atomic Kitten, they want to talk about girl bands and boy bands and gossip but people need to find out about her – Tash Hamilton, not the girl in Atomic Kitten. My role is to help peel back the layers a bit. The crucial bit is how do we do that safely, in a way that makes sense to the audience and reaches more people without leaving that person vulnerable. 

What are the Positives to Come out Coaching?

You’ll find it incredibly liberating once you have peeled back a layer and shared something. The important thing to remember is that people aren’t real, they are your audience, your family and inner circle are real. If you make an impression on your audience you take a huge positive away because you’ve made an impression and inspired them to change something about their lives when you connect with them successfully. 

You have a Book! Closed Mouths Don’t Get Fed

That phrase has been around for a long time. I heard it in a line in a Lizzo song and I thought wow that’s really powerful. My clients tend to be entrepreneurs, they want to become more visible and share their message. Enter Glossophabia – fear of public speaking and/or social anxiety. If you’re not talking then no one will know what you do, they won’t understand your message and then they won’t come to you to buy/learn/use your message. So basically the book in short is –  if you don’t ask you don’t get!

Let’s Talk about your Background that is a big motivation behind the book? How did you End up Homeless?

I grew up on council estates in Preston. Within my family domestic abuse was inherent and rife, it was all I knew…I didn’t know how it was to be treated well by a partner. So I was always seeking to be loved and craving attention in a way that my dad didn’t show to me.  As you grow older that upbringing informs a lot of decisions – ones that I made about relationships. I wanted stability, a husband, a mortgage – so I settled for a guy who didn’t want any of this – I railroaded him into buying a house, having a baby, getting married – then he left 2 weeks after we sent out the wedding invites. 

In 2008 just before the market crashed, I found myself very vulnerable. I had a great job but fell into a relationship with someone not so kind. The relationship became abusive, I fell pregnant very quickly. This is often a symptom of someone in domestic violence – you become their anchor whilst they can sleep around. This then escalated from him cheating through to him being violent. I was 4 months pregnant when the real violence started – after that we parted company, but I’d keep inviting him back because I believed no one else was going to love me. He was texting other women in the hospital whilst I was giving birth. 

When you’re in that kind of relationship though it’s hard to see logic outside of it. It culminated in him strangling me, I had to get an injunction in place and impose a more formal ending. I was forced to access domestic violence services in the area. Off the back of it I lost my house as with 2 children under 4 I couldn’t afford the mortgage and could only pay for nursery as that was their normality. We were sofa surfing whilst I was trying to work to and from London. I felt like I was living a double life. 

And then I thought everyone was better off without me… I took kids into bed one evening and I wasn’t sure if I was kissing them goodnight or goodbye. At that moment I knew I needed to start ‘happening’ to life. I started asking for help. I opened up more and focused on my personal development. Everything shifted from then.

And now you have an incredible business! How are you Working during Lockdown?

I am so busy at the moment! Businesses are having to pivot hugely to the online world using methods they’ve never used before such as interviews, pre recorded videos, webinars etc. These methods have become a huge part of marketing strategies at the moment and my place is to help prepare the presenters to get the best out of the method they’re using. Everyone is scrolling on their phones so being able to speak online has become a real need for business and a skill that not everyone can deliver naturally!

What would your Advice be to People suffering from Anxiety during a crisis?

There are 3 tips I’d share…

1. Remember that if you have a business, more often than not you want to help people. Get out there and share the message – over share if you have to. If you’re not sharing what you do then the people your business is directed at are going unhelped. 
2. Get ‘big’ – broaden your shoulders and stand up tall. Place yourself as an alpha in the room. In the animal kingdom ‘life’ comes down to 3 outcomes…a) other animals accept what we do…b) animals turn on each other and you are cast out from the pack…c) animals turn each other and attack and kill. Don’t let the fear of b) and c) overcome you in human terms. Fear comes from the brain – people think we’ll die if we talk! Then your stress hormone fires off and you are consumed by self doubt. So flood your body with testosterone by holding yourself big. There is an incredible TED talk by Amy Cuddy referencing how body language affects the way others see us – I’d recommend watching it.
3. Get still – breathe, take a breath. Remember you have a gift!

My overriding advice would be to when all else fails, adopt the Wonder Woman Pose! (stand up ladies and try it…)

We have the absolute honour at Sistr of meeting sistrs from all walks of life. Dani’s experience and tenacity is far reaching. If you’d like to reach out to Dani for a chat, to learn about her Bee Heard speaker course then give us a shout.

The post Show Up, Wise Up & Rise Up with Dani Wallace appeared first on Sistr Blog.

Sistr speaks to Resham Kotecha about running for Parliament. What are the barriers she believes put women off becoming MPs? Which factors affect women becoming MPs? How can they be turned into positive reasons to enter politics?

Let’s start on a high note. Resham is a huge advocate of women in politics. Having stood for Parliament twice, she’s determined to make it third time lucky. When Resham speaks her energy and passion radiate through our chat. She speaks passionately about having the ability to put your thoughts into action. And yet in another breath, acknowledges that there are barriers for women; there is no point pretending there aren’t. 

Let’s look at those barriers and knock them down. 

Policy Overwhelm

Who the heck knows every policy there is to know? Ask any MP on minor details and they’ll stumble at some point on something along the way. However, men think they can do a better job regardless of whether they know policy. Women, on the other hand, will count themselves out if they don’t think they have all the knowledge.

How can we change that? Resham addresses this by stating that anyone can learn policy. You do not need to be reliant on it. What you cannot learn is communication skills, empathy, and the ability to listen. These are the skills needed to serve your community. Women hold themselves back if they don’t know every policy but let’s look at it from another angle.

You already know more than you think. If you’re a parent you’ll probably know about education policy to some extent. Do you work? Then you’ll probably have some knowledge and be affected by tax and working rights policy. Have you owned a house and made changes? Perhaps you’ll have explored local planning policy. There you go, you know more than you realise! Anyone can learn and that learning can help a lot of people. 

Relatability – You Can’t Be What You Can’t See

How many women can you count who you regularly see on TV who are in the world of Politics? Very few. Despite there being the largest representation of women in politics around the world (24.3%) and the highest in the UK Parliament (a whopping 220 women at an all-time high of 34%) you still see very few women on TV. So you have a situation where as young girls grow up the chances of considering Politics as a career are slim as there is no one to relate to. 

Resham stresses that this creates a self-serving cycle where we as women, don’t think Politics is a place for us. Children need visuals, someone they can see and go “I want to be like that person”. In visualising, it changes the impact on what we think we can do. 

Can this change? Certainly, the stats are there and on the increase in terms of women who can be seen as role models. Educational Outreach Programmes are being run at national and regional levels enabling Politics to be heard and engaged with more easily. 

Resilience

This attribute is one of the most important skills Resham has learned during her experience in Politics and one where many women (and men for that matter) fall. 

On the campaign trail you are doing letter drops at 5 am, relentless media interviews, live meetings with live social media streams (and hence live trolls sitting in the audience). It is not for the faint-hearted. But Resham thrives on this. You can make a change, not just impacting one person, but impacting a whole country. A whole demographic can be influenced or affected by a policy that you might have driven. It’s a life-defining moment. When you think about it from that perspective, it makes it all the more worthwhile.

Fear of Failure

If you lose a seat it’s a very public failure in Politics. Results are announced publicly and usually to a room of constituents baying for someone’s blood. Resham explains that it’s important to compartmentalise your emotions. You need a strong network around you who can make you realise you still matter. This is where women, a network of fellow women candidates, or women within your inner circle are invaluable. A group of women backing each other is an unrivaled strength and something women need to remember. You have to fail to learn the lessons that make you more impressive. 

Training and mentoring play a huge role in overcoming a fear of failure. Initiatives such as Women2Win have been established to increase women’s participation in Conservative Party Politics by mentoring and coaching.

Would Resham stand again after 2 defeats? Absolutely is the clear answer, best thing she’s ever done. The skills learned along the way have proved invaluable and life-changing. The mentors and contacts met along the way have proved inspiring and crucial. Can women get on a level pegging with men in Politics? The barriers are there but perhaps we as women need to remove them, remove the mental barriers that tell us it’s not right for women to pursue it. It is right, it is possible and we are cheering for you Resham! 

If you’d like to reach out to Resham about pursuing a career in Politics or her recently created public speaking agency Podium Perfect then, as ever, do drop us a line at Sistr.. 

The post How do Women Get Into Politics? appeared first on Sistr Blog.

Simple Tips to Help A Business in Covid Times

Coronavirus has seen an acceleration of how the work environment of the future will look. ‘Pivot’ has become the buzzword for 2020. Teams are being transformed, the change has been unpredicted, rapid, and unplanned. 

Can we use the Coronavirus catalyst to lay the groundwork for future essential workplace tools?

Sistr spoke to Lara Morgan, a straight-talking entrepreneur, and investor. Lara is an expert when it comes to thinking and acting outside of the box. 

Here are 5 of our top business skills to help your business navigate the current COVID-19 climate.

Leadership is Lonely

Do you feel lonely as a leader? You’re not alone. Harvard Business Review featured an article whereby the author reported that 50% of CEOs report experiencing feelings of loneliness. Of this 50%, 61% believe it impacts their performance negatively. Focusing on first time CEOs, the report found nearly 70% experience feelings of isolation.  

If you’re the leader, how can you address loneliness? Lara’s advice is simple and concise. 

Accept it is normal. Acknowledge you are not alone in your feelings. Take yourself in hand. 

Loneliness isn’t positive for culture, decision-making, or performance. Find a confidante and/or a mentor. Someone who will give it to you straight. You need honesty and directness. Don’t let yourself become so isolated that you become less in tune with others’ perspectives. You need an outside perspective now more than ever. 

Networks such as sistr exist for this precise reason. A network of women who will listen. A network of women who will guide and offer potential solutions. A network that alleviates loneliness. Your blind spots will be exposed and you’ll have the power to attack them at a deeper level rather than just skimming the surface. You are not alone. 

Prioritize by Profit or People?

In today’s current market of cut-throat competition, companies need to stay focused on the bottom line. Should the bottom line take priority over an organisation’s people? Is profit-over-people an effective strategy? 

Lara highlights the importance of not neglecting your ‘books’. Never assume that it’s ok to push finances down the priority ladder. 

Set aside the time for finances, even if it is the most cursed day of your week/month. 

The question remains, should they take precedence over people? According to a recent report, 66% of HR Managers failed to consider staff amongst the top 3 assets of the company. 

The data speaks for itself – this is wrong. A recent HBR report found that companies that invested in staff initiatives were four times more profitable per employee than those who didn’t. 

So the mindset needs to change. Staff need to be viewed as your most valuable asset. Regarding staff as liabilities rather than assets is dangerous ground. You need to change both in the way you view employees and your methods of recruiting, incentivizing, and retaining. This is most pertinent with millennials who, by 2025 will make up a whopping 75% of the workforce. 

Change your approach and play the long game. Invest in training programs that foster success mindsets and development that, in the long term, will grow your top line, despite causing a short-term bulge on the bottom line. 

Should a Team Have a Hierarchy? 

Hierarchy is defined as being the vertical differences between team members. Do teams operate more efficiently in a hierarchical culture? Does a hierarchy dampen team effectiveness? 

Firstly define ‘team effectiveness’. What conditions do you need in place to enable a team to operate effectively? Clear, commonly defined goals; respecting and acknowledging team members and their role in the team; strong comms; defining success in your business; appropriate resources. 

Does a hierarchy have a positive impact on your team effectiveness? Yes, it can map out career paths. Yes, it can create authority and unity. Yes, it can provide effective organization and accountability. But, it can also lead to conflict, confusion, the dilution of information, and the absence of a skilled network.

Speaking to Lara, her message is clear where her approach lies. 

Remove the hierarchy, report ‘up’ to your team, and beyond to your customer. Your customer is key. If you don’t know your customer, you know nothing. 

How can you then expect your employees to follow your lead? Remove the ‘leader’ and connect yourselves as a broad network of units; without one unit the network collapses. 

Pack Power – Can Women Trust Women?

It’s an age-old stereotype – women don’t support other women. We view each other as competition and won’t collaborate. Let’s face it, every woman will have experienced a situation of cultural and systemic hurdles that often prevent them from advancing in the workplace. Women’s rights have come on leaps and bounds but as Lara says;

We can either sit and cry about it or, we can gather power from ‘our pack’. 

Women supporting women is an incredible force to be reckoned with. Raising each other up and collaborating is the most effective way to change stereotypes. Sistr’s mission is to create an ‘inner circle’ for women that fosters trust and encouragement. By forming close connections we as women can share experiences. The power of the pack is then immeasurable. You have a networking circle based on common goals, shared interests and diverse experience. Suddenly networking is no longer work but relationship building. 

Can Virtual Teams Operate Harmoniously?

Let’s hit this one straight on. The answer is no. No team operates harmoniously. If you expect harmony, you do so at the risk of losing respect. Take a look at your team. You’ll have all sorts of skill sets, ages, religions, sexuality, parents, single parents, extroverts, introverts. Would you expect such diversity to live happily ever after? No, nor would you want them to. It would suppress anyone wanting to offer an opinion, for fear of upsetting the harmonious balance. In the absence of harmony, how should teams operate?

Choose respect over harmony. Treat yourself the same as your staff and treat your boss the same way you’d like them to treat you. It’s a two-way street. You’re never going to drive in the same direction all the time but, everyone wants their ideas and presence to be respected.

So 2020, we see you, we hear you, and we’re going to raise you a new mindset. Now is the perfect time to reset company cultural boundaries. The behaviours and processes that haven’t worked in the past? Draw a line in the sand. Reaffirm what will stay. Confirm what will go. 

Do you need a helping hand? Are you looking for guidance? We have mentors from all industries who are here to help. click here.

The post 5 Skills for Navigating Your Business Through COVID-19 appeared first on Sistr Blog.

Rebecca Foden, Head of Talent Acquisition for Transport for London delved into the impact Covid-19 is having on the recruitment and talent acquisition industry. Her article ‘Bounce Forward Not Back’ sheds light on business cultures, access to new talent and the changes required to pivot as a business and move forward positively.

“An important moment of reflection and call to action for every TA team, we’re in this together”
Covid-19 has disrupted our ways of working forever. It has caused ‘Big Change’ for every organisation, through the loss of revenue, disrupted supply chains and customer’s reactions to brands based on how companies prioritised the needs of their people, customers and shareholders.

Across LinkedIn and social media, we are seeing thought-leaders push out content about the impact of Covid-19 and undoubtedly the most popular question from candidates (those we seek to hire) in years to come is going to be,

“How did you treat your people during Covid-19” – which brands have come out on top during Covid-19?
The curse of the virus will have far-reaching impacts. The reality is that a moment of truth for corporate cultures has been created and both consumers and potential employees are observing brands that have responded well with a compassionate purpose and caring values. Employers will need to think differently about their brands as a result of this crisis. Many will need to quickly define a new purpose and set of values as they will need to show how they treated their supply chains, partners and communities during the crisis as well as describing their new virtual culture to employees.
A new role for Talent Acquisition (TA) is emerging, as we will need to help regulate and support these organisations to story-tell the new culture and employer brand remotely managing a very different set of expectations from potential employees. Organisations will need to think about the following trends and respond appropriately:

The future workplace is here now. What is the impact of Covid-19 on Talent Acquisition?
On the upside, for TA this is the catalyst that the industry has been fantasising about; An infinite and boundless talent pool without the restriction of geographic boundaries or location strategies based on talent availability of skills. The opportunity to leverage untapped talent in the global marketplace – The new normal has been set, ‘working from home has now been tested at scale’ there’s no longer any excuse – this is the springboard that we’ve been waiting on.

Is an Inclusive Workplace of the future finally in sight?
A far more inclusive and diverse workforce may evolve as we change our whole hiring practices removing every barrier that has prevented us from hiring great talent previously – up till now the unshifting were location and flexible working. The new normal means that we now have a borderless talent pool that is Infinite and Boundless” – the open talent economy has landed – people and work in a borderless workplace. This will be a profound change for every organisation; whose talent will become attractive to a larger audience.

There is no workplace like home. What’s the impact of Covid-19 on working from home and flexible working?
Talent and employers will be able to seek each other out, on more equal terms, from anywhere in the world. Covid-19 has accelerated the open economy with over a billion people globally being forced to work remotely. For those organisations standing at this cliff edge and tentatively peering over doubting this new virtual world muting a ‘quasi / hybrid back to normal’ type scenario will be left out of the ‘war for skills’ and will be left behind. The Disrupted HR club has spoken about the ‘E A C H’ model for a while now – ‘Employees as Adults, Consumers and Human Beings’.

The crisis has applied this framework by chance, the previous parental approach that has hampered organisational success with over prescriptive rules to everyone based on a few roguish employees has been temporarily halted with many organisations having to totally ‘trust’ their employees in the new virtual world. The new virtual reality of treating employees like adults at scale has emphasised ‘trust’ at scale and organisations that embrace this new way of working will spark greater creativity, productivity and engagement.
This has been witnessed already across society, in these extraordinary times of ‘frugality’ we’re seeing boundless creativity, innovation and purpose from career pivoting to find new income, millions of volunteers supporting the NHS, 3D printers making face shields at home as well as millions of people working flexibly/from home in many roles where previously business cases were dismissed and or denied with over complicated bureaucracy.
The inconceivable has finally happened and it is not only good for our people but also for our planet…

Working from Anywhere – on a beach, mountain, Timbuktu
The idea of “Working From Anywhere” (WFA) was cited by the Harvard Business Review in August 2019 re-imagining the future workplace where employees could literally work from anywhere, living where they choose anywhere in the world as long as there was an internet connection. Seven months ago – before COVID-19, this notion was unlikely, farfetched and unfathomable. Promoting working from home policies for new hires was cited as one of the biggest challenges facing the modern recruiter; hiring managers reluctantly agreed to home working for difficult to fill roles only with muted approval.
Hiring Managers have often worried about remote employees working less, mixing personal responsibilities with work as well as the decreased communication and collaboration among coworkers as well as the lack of informal learning/coaching that typically occurs every day in the office. We know that employees value being treated like adults and working remotely. They feel more valued balancing work and life, picking kids up from school or attending to their caring responsibilities. Moving closer to ageing parents to a location with a lower cost of living.

Leadership skills of the future
A new normal will bring about a new requirement to negotiate and manage a different set of expectations, skills and leadership. This means that TA teams will need to rethink their sourcing and assessment strategies among other strategies.
Previous tools may no longer be applicable for scale and a greater expectation will also be placed on recruitment processes to be technology enabled by candidates
TA will need to look very different and the adoption of technology to automate the entire recruitment process with a particular emphasis on attraction, engagement, assessment and onboarding will be accelerated
EVP, assessment and Onboarding will be vital focal points and triangulating these technologies together. COVID-19 has accelerated the adoption of tools we use online espousing new workspaces and cultures
A focus on pipeline and diversity; this is a Big Opportunity for every firm to seize the hard to reach talent pools
Talent Acquisition will need to identify Leaders that can manage complex virtual ecosystems in real time. This will require a new set of relationships between employee and manager.
Trust, Autonomy, Flexibility will be expected and pervasive. Future employees will choose those organisations above others that espouse these basic standards achieved by the new virtual reality.

There is no going back! How does HR respond to Covid-19?
For wider HR, it’s a once in a lifetime opportunity to sunset some of the unpopular processes such as yearly performance reviews or unnecessary mid-year recording of performance reviews, yearly employee temperature checks, in favour of the new less formal setting engaging with our talent at home – their pets, family and the warmer atmosphere. A new leadership capability will emerge that focuses on empathy, listening and compassion
Progressive HR teams need to design products that are virtually fit for purpose with regular temperature checks and interactive engagement to stay connected to their talent. This means that TA and HR will need to be Braver and strategically enabled and motivated, with reduced budgets things will need to be done at scale and differently. Organisations still hiring will need to re-define their talent strategy, vision and whom their critical hires will be. As the market shifts to an open talent economy, investing in talent programs will become essential to execute complex business strategies.
The above presents most organisations with good news, particularly for a large proportion of their existing workforce: Millennials (born between 1980 – 2000). They currently comprise half of the US workforce and by 2025, 75 percent of the global workforce. They represent over half of the current workforce in each organisation as they have taken over other generational demographics as a majority. Growing up with technology, mobile apps and innovative platforms they will be digitally native and thrive in the new culture setting. Deloitte reported that nearly 75 per cent of all millennials want to work from home or remotely. HR teams will need to think long term about the side effects of homeworking and e-presenteeism on well being as many people may feel obliged to be online 24/7.

For Talent Acquisition teams, it’s a prudent time to think about the future impact to TA and review the current talent acquisition maturity model across your organisation. A new virtual layer will need to be added to existing operating models with respect to your organization’s maturity level. We will now need to think about the whole TA process from attracting, engaging, sourcing, assessing and onboarding and think about what aspects can be moved to fully virtual and inclusive solutions.

Some useful resources:
https://recruitmentevents.co/wp-content/uploads/2020/01/Talent-Acquisition-Maturity-Model.pdf
https://www2.deloitte.com/content/dam/Deloitte/global/Documents/HumanCapital/dttl-hc-english-opentalenteconomy.pdf
https://www.inc.com/peter-economy/the-millennial-workplace-of-future-is-almost-here-these-3-things-are-about-to-change-big-time.html
https://hbr.org/2019/08/is-it-time-to-let-employees-work-from-anywhere?_lrsc=85c1c88b-ba18-4c83-858c-f275a2e93970

The post Bounce Forward Not Back – Impact of COVID-19 on Recruitment appeared first on Sistr Blog.

Nakita Ross talks to us about life on the frontline, her struggle with PTSD and where the Antarctic challenge comes from?

Sistr had the honour of being given access to a frontline hero, Nakita Ross. Nakita is a member of the Fire Brigade in London whilst also fronting the charity group – Antarctic Fire Angels. The group’s challenge is awe-inspiring. Their aim is to become the 1st all-female team of firefighters to traverse the Antarctic using muscle power.

Why did you become a firefighter? 

I knew I was always interested in the public sector. Having come from a family of police officers and military it was inevitable. They were an inspiration for this choice. The message was clear, I wanted to help people, to be active and I knew being part of the public sector would allow me to do this. I had been an Air Cadet as a teenager and had a great passion for this. My parents had wanted me to go to Sandhurst to become an officer in the Army. However, I was in a relationship at the time and my boyfriend did not want me to go. My one “what if” moment! The relationship obviously did not last, so listen to your parents! They do know what they are talking about!!

A year later I applied for the Police and Fire Brigade and was accepted to both. My Dad was a retired police officer at the time and I turned to him for advice. He said that if there was any other job he wished he could have done, it was to be a Firefighter. And the rest is history!! Over 13 years later, I am incredibly proud of what I have achieved to date.

How do you mentally prepare to go to a call out? 

It is definitely a skill you learn over time. You have to remain calm, allowing yourself to take on board everything that is happening around you. The way you react and respond to situations, it’s a great influence over other crew members and how an incident can be maintained.

Tell us a little about Grenfell and the Croydon Tram Crash and your PTSD diagnosis post these experiences?

I attended both at a time where there were no lives to be saved. The task was to recover those that sadly did not survive the incident. The Croydon tram crash was extremely difficult. I was due to start my first-day shift and heard the news when I awoke. I knew my day was going to be a difficult one. It was a stomach-churning moment, as I had grown up in this area. Is there a chance I might know someone? A victim? I told myself I just had to remain professional and continue to do my job. Sadly a day later, I learned that 2 of the victims were friends and relatives of close friends.

The news hit me hard and I did not have a supportive partner at the time. He would regularly offload his problems on to me and I would listen. When it came to asking for help, I was told to not talk to him about it. Go and get help elsewhere. As you guessed, that relationship ended shortly after that! Without going into further details about Grenfell, what I had to do on the ground there for 3 days took its toll. 

How did you move forward?

It took a long time for me to get help. I had tried after the Croydon Tram crash but, sadly I just felt at the time this was not for me due to a few reasons. I became angry that I was not strong enough to deal with what I had seen. Other events from my career flashed back up and I detached myself from everyone. I was tired all the time. I didn’t want to look after myself and what was the point? I had failed as a Firefighter, at my job! The guilt of suffering when you weren’t first on the scene was also heavy on me. Surely my fellow firefighters that were there when lives could be saved deserved to feel like this? But not me.

But that all changed when I started to receive counseling. I needed to ask for help and I am so glad I did.

How do you deal with PTSD? 

Accepting that I needed help. I do a job where I have to be tough, to be strong and now I realise that you can not be like this 24/7. I allowed myself to grieve the events I had encountered. You have to accept that all trauma is relative to that person. We have to stop comparing ourselves. Everyone can have their own black dog of depression, some may be the size of a chihuahua and others, a great dane! Still the same thing but, different to that individual.

What advice would you give to fellow PTSD sufferers?

You have to allow your mind to process trauma to allow it to heal. Talking is a big part of that. Of course, the normal advice of healthy eating, exercise, and rest is a part of it. But, surrounding yourself with people you can trust, to discuss how you feel and will continue to support you is the key. Be brave, be strong and I promise you it will get better.

What are the Antarctic Angels and what led you to form this group?

The Antarctic Fire Angels are the first team of 6 female firefighters to traverse the Antarctic using muscle power alone. Following a tough year of starting to tackle my PTSD, I attended the Women in the Fire Service Training and Development Event to teach Urban Search and Rescue to attendees. There was a keynote speaker each year and it was the turn of Sophie Montagne, a member of the Ice Maiden team. They were the first team of women to cross the Antarctic and sparked a fire!

What is your main goal of the challenge? What would be the top 3 things you’d like to achieve from it?

We want to tackle the stigma of mental health. We want to highlight mental health within emergency service workers and empower young girls and women to go forward and achieve their goals. We would love to see the number of women applying to become Firefighters continue to rise.

What link do you make between the challenge and mental health? 

We are complete novices going into the unknown, which when tackling mental health can be quite similar! We are going into an extreme environment quite opposite to our role as Firefighters.

How is it helping you with your PTSD?

It has given me focus and a goal. It is not just for me but for all my friends and fellow firefighters that continue to struggle daily with their battle. I want to show those that are struggling with mental health that you can still achieve incredible things. Mental health does not define you, let it empower you.

Have your fellow adventurers come to the challenge with similar reasons?

Each member of the Team has their own story to tell, whether it be about mental health or the importance of encouraging young girls and women to not let their gender hold them back from reaching their full potential. 

What are your main fears of the challenge and how do you hope to overcome them both before the adventure and during it?

The main fears? Actually raising the funds so we can get out there and achieve it! We had so many fundraising events p[lanned for this year but due to COVID19 it has set us back. We have continued to raise money for our charities however and are really proud of that through this difficult time.

We have interests in this becoming a documentary so hopefully, some companies that want to support our team and our vision will come forward to help make this happen. Other than that I know the whole team is 100% committed to making this expedition happen. They are training so hard, working on ideas, and spreading the Antarctic Fire Angel message!

What tips would you give to people dealing with anxiety?

Don’t be afraid to say that it is anxiety. It is not a failing to admit you are suffering and it really is ok to not be ok. It was only when I started describing my feelings to a friend she then realised that she too had been suffering. She had convinced herself that that was just the way she was and had accepted it. I started setting myself goals, small at first, and then getting bigger and bolder. Simple things like going for a walk on my own, then taking myself out on a “me” date! I know it sounds silly but if you cannot enjoy your own company and recognise your own feelings then you will struggle to tackle them head-on.

I told myself to also stop saying no or making excuses to going out to social events all the time. I would literally have a breakdown about the nerves of going somewhere I hadn’t been before, afraid of something I could not quite put my finger on. So start saying yes!! Start to have fun again! This leads on to make sure your circle of friends are supportive and positive; come away from those that do not have the same vision as you.

If you stood in front of your 10yr old self right now what advice would you give for the future? What would be the proudest achievements you’d tell her about? 

You are a beautiful soul with so much to give, you will go forward to make a difference in this world. Continue to be kind, even to those that do wrong by you. Always listen to your gut instinct, you will not be wrong and it will save you many times. Keep being strong, keep being fierce, and most importantly be you.

If you’re struggling with PTSD or anxiety, remember you are not alone. Sistr has a huge network of professionals from all walks of life who are here to help. If you’d like to reach out to Nakita to understand her journey further or ask for advice, give us a shout. If you’d like to explore other advice then don’t let anything stop you reaching out to us.

The post How do Frontline Heroes Tackle PTSD? appeared first on Sistr Blog.

We recently caught up with the ultimate powerhouse Wies Bratby – known as the ultimate negotiator…with everyone except her own kids…! Wies is a top lawyer-turned-HR Director-turned-coach-slash-Consultant who talks us through advice and tips for women looking to forward their careers and positions. 

Through her coaching and consulting practise, Women in Negotiation, Wies helps women across the globe realise their worth, communicate it and get them the positions and salaries they want through her online group coaching programme. Wies is also President of Lean in Switzerland, a sought after keynote speaker and workshop trainer inspiring women to proactively negotiate what they want.

Could you Explain Who you are and what you do?

I am from the Netherlands and my husband is English, I have 2 daughters. In short, I teach women to negotiate their worth. I focus on women in their career and salary negotiations. Recently I branched out to working with female entrepreneurs who are providing a service and making sure they get paid a lot for their work as an entrepreneur. My goal is to end the gender wage gap whilst having fun helping women step into their confidence. I only work with women. 

What Made you go into this Line of Work in the First Place?

Steve Jobs talks about how you can connect the dots in your career and I wanted to help with that. I’ve always been obsessed with negotiation from a young age, I thought I was going to change the world so I went into law school then I joined the biggest law firm in the Netherlands thinking through law I could change the world. I ended up paper pushing and got very bored. I went on to negotiate the largest settlement in the history of The Netherlands whilst a lawyer. Then I started being asked constantly to advise on achieving settlements.  During this time I was still not happy doing what I was doing. I moved to HK where I couldn’t continue being a lawyer so I ended up working and setting up HR for a huge company. Through this role I taught people and trained them in negotiation skills. I found that wherever I was in the world, women always gathered around and said this is really important, how can I use your advice? Can I talk to you further about my situation? I’d experience the same thing, anywhere in the world – women saying “I suck at negotiation”. I did some research into the role of gender in negotiation and discovered it wasn’t just my friends having issues, its a global phenomenon. I have 2 daughters and read that it will take 100 years to end gender parity – I wanted to make an impact for my daughters. Let’s empower women individually to get the skills to take control of their careers so they’re no longer at the mercy of anyone else. 

Does It make you Angry when you Hear Stories from Women about their Positions?

Yes, it’s so often the same story. It riles me that it can be so obvious and there’s so much talent that goes to waste. “I am undervalued” and “I am not getting opportunities” – why is this? Usually the reason is that ‘Bob’ down the corridor speaks up rather than actually doing the work. I see so many amazing women who have gifts to share with the world – the reason they can’t put it out there and share their talents is because people aren’t recognising that – women aren’t communicating it. The injustice is wrong as their talent and ambition is irrelevant when this happens. 

What are your tips for anyone in a position now considering their work ‘position’?

Try not to get emotional and don’t bring drama. You need to prepare thoroughly – use role play to practise – have every scenario thrown at you by whoever you’re practising with. Don’t make it personal. Don’t take things personally. Men can more easily switch the switch, they can compartmentalise, they flip the switch because it’s ‘just business’. This is an area that we can definitely learn from the guys in that respect. You need to back yourself. Nobody else is going to do this for you so someone has to – so it might as well be you! Don’t be the devil’s advocate – drop an anchor, ask for a certain number then say “but it doesn’t matter if you can’t do that”…you’ve then added doubt – don’t be the person to minimise yourself. 

What is your advice to women in a tricky position at the moment in lockdown?

During a crisis as huge as this, people go into collective fear mode, they’ll question what it means for their career and lives. I would warn against fear if possible, try not to project into the negative unknown. As people we’re ‘meaning making’ machines so aim for the positive. This has got to be seen as an opportunity – leverage that opportunity. We’re in a massive shift at the moment, it is happening to all of us globally, not just localised. When there’s a shift its likened to an earthquake, the tectonic plates start shifting and when those plates then settle they’ll never settle in the same place again. Gaps are created between the plates – this is what is happening to businesses – they are collectively readjusting and assessing. How should we change? What’s working for us? In those adjustments periods changes are made at a fundamental level so jump in, assess and see what changes can be made by you. How can I serve there and help there? Figure out if you can do work at a higher level than before. This then leads to a conversation about what someone at that level should get paid. 

What’s your Advice on Finding a Job in this Climate? 

See this as a great opportunity to have a look around, companies are definitely looking at their gaps. Don’t get disheartened, get excited because things in the world are shifting. The whole scattergun approach should be avoided, steer clear of applying for loads of things at same time just randomly through the internet. The online application process with no acknowledgment is a broken system. I would advise clients to not apply for jobs but firstly have conversations with people and discuss what issues they’re struggling with – is there room for you to help them fix issues? Think about where you want to take your future. Then look at your network, start with one person, speak with that one person. ‘Virtual coffee’ has become the new form of networking and chatting. In this climate people have time to talk at the moment and would welcome a ‘change’ from their routine/regular faces.

What Negotiating Skills can you Advise to Mums in Lockdown?!

I do not advise people to negotiate with their kids…! My toddlers rule my house! I would however advise you to negotiate with your partner during these times. Sit with your partner and negotiate with him/her about the setup you have together when taking care of the kids/the home. This is an incredibly important moment to put an end to the fact that women do ⅔ of housework and emotional labour – it needs sharing and dividing up. This has a massive effect on mental health, prolonged exposure to stress has massive effects on health. Negotiate the set up you have at home – the division should be fair. What works for us? What doesn’t work for us? Your free time should be valued and as protected as your partner’s. You must however lower your standards at the moment (and in the future). Try not to let ‘how things should be’ dictate your feelings – your way isn’t the only way and not necessarily the best way. Take your partner seriously when you have the conversation, lower your expectations for how ‘home’ should operate.  

We thank Wies hugely for an incredibly interesting chat and useful and inspiring tips. If you’d like to reach out to Wies for further advice or enquire about her coaching please do contact her through instagram womeninnegotiation.

The post Negotiate Your Way to the Top with Wies Bratby appeared first on Sistr Blog.

We talked to fabulous Chloe Madeley ahead of our re-invention panel in January. Chloe is a huge face in the fitness industry and she tells us how and why she re-invented her body, mind and life.

Chloe is on the panel for our re-invention event on the 23rd January. Grab your tickets here.

Who are you?
Chloe Madeley, Qualified Gym Instructor, PersonalTrainer, Nutritionist, Fitness Model. Author of Transform Your Body With Weights and podcaster, THE BODCAST

What did you re-invent?
My body, my mind and my life.

What triggered the change?
Crippling anxiety and panic attacks eventually met with the ability to be present, Via training (specifically weight lifting).

How did you go about it?
I implemented a weekly, structured training plan. 4 days a week, with a performance-specific nutrition plan.

What did you learn from it?
How to push myself, how to believe in myself, how hard work gets you results.

Would you do anything differently looking back?
Not a thing.

What would you say to someone in the same situation as you?
Find something that forces you to be present, and that provides an outcome. This can be training, cooking, painting…

The post Sistr Q&A with Chloe Madeley appeared first on Sistr Blog.

About Wild Life Botanicals Wild Life Botanicals is the pioneering creation of Cornish Sea Salt co-founder, Ellie Bradshaw. As a full-time working mum, Ellie’s search for a sophisticated social alternative to traditionally high ABV wines, Champagnes and Prosecco’s was left a little flat.With her background in luxury food, drink and hospitality teamed with an appreciation of plant power

– Ellie’s dream of creating an ultra-low alcohol sparkling wine that dialled back on alcohol at the same time dialled up on the health and wellness benefits began to grow.Following months of innovative product development with a specialist team including a highly respected naturopath and medical herbalist; a leading international oenologist; an award-winning taste and sensory developer; master brewer and food scientist, Wild Life Botanicals looks set to raise the bar in the dynamic NOLO choices.

Crafted in Cornwall and unlike anything else on the market, Wild Life Botanicals is a new kind of drink for a new generation of conscious drinkers that want a no limits way of life with no compromise.About SistrSistr’s, a dedicated platform for women to connect, share and learn. On Sistr, professionals gain access to a network of qualified female experts covering a whole range of industries and skills, to help them grow their business.

Sistrs can chat with other Sistrs via the platform on a variety of business topics, find out about and attend a carefully curated events schedule and choose to work together beyond the platform, hand-picking from a network of Sistrs to create their own advisory board and build out a team of elite female professionals to move their business forward. Qualified in their respective fields with proven evidence-based experience, Sistrs can chat, participate in forum discussions or commit to mentoring for just one hour per month which they do so with no expectations in return.

However, they’re aware that their consultancy can lead to forming beneficial relationships beyond the initial hour. Creating real opportunities Sistr to Sistr.

The post Ep. 12 Wild Life – Ellie Bradshaw appeared first on Sistr Blog.

A bit about 3 Sided cube A mobile app agency by the seaside, working on projects worldwide.Our passion is fuelled by making social impact on a huge scale. Helping organisations around the globe save the world one app at a time.We live for the moments when the work we do drives change using the very latest technology. Since 2009, our gang of clever people have been at the forefront of digital because of our great ability to solve problems.

A bit about Sistr Sistr’s, a dedicated platform for women to connect, share and learn. On Sistr, professionals gain access to a network of qualified female experts covering a whole range of industries and skills, to help them grow their business.

Sistrs can chat with other Sistrs via the platform on a variety of business topics, find out about and attend a carefully curated events schedule and choose to work together beyond the platform, hand-picking from a network of Sistrs to create their own advisory board and build out a team of elite female professionals to move their business forward. Qualified in their respective fields with proven evidence-based experience, Sistrs can chat, participate in forum discussions or commit to mentoring for just one hour per month which they do so with no expectations in return.

However, they’re aware that their consultancy can lead to forming beneficial relationships beyond the initial hour. Creating real opportunities Sistr to Sistr.

The post Ep. 11 Thinking outside of the cube – Sophia ‘Puff’ Story appeared first on Sistr Blog.